I have noticed a trend during any group conversations.Whenever I am in a social setting, for example just sitting with friends/cousins/ colleagues who engage in gossip about who is what and what the other person is doing or did which isn’t even remotely related to me. I honestly don’t care, and so I just have to sit like a rock while they do it. I am happy to have a one on one convo talking about other things. Since, I don’t speak much, people assume that I am a pushover and ask me to bring them refreshments (just happened) while they happily engage in ‘drama’. I just don’t want to be a mat anyone can use, and I don’t really care about other people to be honest (trying to not sound rude but it is what it is). It’s just that these things don’t interest me. I feel like an NPC, I don’t want to anymore.
5 comments
You’re not alone in this.
You shouldnt care, people who gossip are sad
Some people just, inexplicably (to me at least) love gossip. You know what they say: great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people. Good on you for continuing to rise above.
That said the difference between gossip and just life updates is very simple: would they be ok with the person they’re discussing hearing what they said? Like for example, is it negative or petty talk/speculation about a person’s life or relationships? That’s gossip. Is it sharing that so-and-so just got their degree? Maybe not.
Thanks for the advice, now I’ll just talk about my cat’s life updates instead.
I don’t know what you mean by this exactly. Are you saying you don’t care about the gossip, or you don’t care about other people’s stories in general? Are we talking about people who are talking about their day, or what they are doing with their lives, or are these people insulting others?
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If they’re just straight up gossiping, then I don’t see a problem with not caring.
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If it’s anything that’s not gossip, and it’s just them telling stories.. I think you should try to learn to be interested. I think people often times believe that we have our interests, and anything outside of that is uninteresting by default. That’s not really how it works, imo. You can learn to be interested in almost anything, you just have to figure out how. When someone is telling you a story, treat it like an adventure and get curious about where the story is going. You certainly don’t HAVE to be interested in them, but they also don’t HAVE to be interested in you. learning how to be interested in normal, every day things will make life much more enjoyable all around, and even if you aren’t currently interested in those things, you can learn how to be.