being in a relationship with one person means letting go of any chemistry you could explore with another. how did you accept that?

14 comments

1. No, not really. I mean sure, you can always have stray thoughts here and there, but would I ever give up what I have now to go back to the disaster that is modern dating? Not in a million years.

   (It’s something my wife and I often joke about “Ugh, could you imagine if we had to date again?)

2. It has never bothered me in my entire 12 years with my husband.

3. If you’re asking yourself this question, don’t get married yet. Date instead.

4. Personally no, my partner gives me all I could ever need and I look forward to rest of my life with them. However monogamy is not for everyone and that’s okay. It’s how you communicate it to those you’re involved with that matters.

5. I have never once felt that way in 15 years of marriage. I did however think it with a long time boyfriend before I met my husband. So maybe you aren’t with the right person

6. Then I don’t think you understand what love is…

   I am not giving up freedoms… I gaining security, safety, and LOVE.

7. No, not really. I hated dating and I’m ecstatic I never have to do it again.

8. By the time I got married there was no desire to explore something with someone new. There are times I miss the excitement of a new relationship but then I look at my partner and I know nothing new could hold a candle to what I have. If I want something new we make something new together

9. I think you can explore that human connection through friendships first of all. As long as you have clear boundaries ant aren’t being shady you can never have enough friends.

   And then also I never feel the need to explore romantic connections because I am fulfilled by my husband and by myself. I love myself and don’t need outside validation from others, and if I do I know I can turn to my husband for it. And anytime I want to go on a date or have sex I have a husband for that. It’s amazing.

10. I just don’t think that constantly chasing that chemical high by cycling through new people is personally appealing or fulfilling. And even if it somehow were, none of that could ever touch what I have with my husband.

11. That is a strange way to ask the age old question.

12. I’d say i definitely had those thoughts which led to commitment issues but eventually I met a man who I quite literally thought I couldn’t do better than lol but you definitely do have a point.

13. Look up ethical non-monogamy or polyamory. You can be in a secure committed relationship and still have the agency to explore your feelings with others.

14. My husband and I have a beautiful marriage AND we have sex with other people.