What is the best real excuse you said for being late at work?

48 comments

1. Last one I used was “Sorry I’m late but who I am as a person means it didn’t work out me being on time”

   I didn’t get in trouble or anything

2. “The train was on fire.”

3. There was a bird stuck in my dryer vent.

4. Water broke

5. I got hit by a car.

6. Flat tire 🙂

7. The fire blocked the highway. LA suburbs are fun sometimes lol

   Or maybe that time a plane landed on the highway.

8. Late for school: youngest ate too many slices of pizza at dinner the night before and threw up all over the car and car seat when we were in between dropping off sister at one school and brother at the other school(about 3 miles). Had to go home and completely clean out the car, seat and kid. In hindsight, I should’ve just given oldest son a day off because once I got everything cleaned up and him dropped off it was time to get Sissy from kindy and then nap and get him.

9. Fell off cliff, broke rib, rib stabbed into my lung.

10. “My neighbor has been stabbed by his friend this morning and CSI was still looking at the blood stains in the hallway.” (My neighbor survived.)

11. Honestly traffic can be so unpredictable at times that a usual commute ends up 10 minutes longer than it should be once out of every 100 trips.

12. “Sorry I’m late, fucking New Orleans”

    Everyone knows what that means

13. A can of expanding foam exploded in my face

14. Back when I worked retail my go to was “sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to be here”

15. I (and ten other cars) got stuck behind a tractor on a dirt road, no area to pass

16. Explosive diarrhea

17. The bridge was stolen

18. Level 2 snow emergency vs hilly country back roads

19. Presidential motorcade.

20. I have once again done a crap job of managing my time. I will try to do better.

21. a car crashed through the roof of the tunnel that my train was in

22. I was fucking my boss in the ass.

23. “Someone jumped in front of the train”

24. My neighbor’s house caught fire and the firetruck was blocking the road.

    …My boss made me take pictures for proof.

25. [removed]

26. My apartment booted my car.

27. A stray cat ate a hole through my wall

28. [removed]

29. I hit a deer while driving to work lol

30. I was stuck going 20mph because I ended up behind a house getting moved.

31. “I hit the bosses car”

    First day at my new job

32. It wasn’t my excuse but when I was a manager, one of my team called in because, and I quote, “I have ants in my pants.”

    I laughed so hard and told her that, even if it was made up, she was excused for creativity.

    When she made it in, she told me she’d done laundry the night before and had just left her clothes folded in a basket on the floor. Somehow, ants got in and all through the clean laundry. She had to do another load before she could get dressed (again) for work.

    Still not sure if that was true, but I still don’t care.

33. Someone died in the building next to mine and the ambulance and firetruck were blocking my car

34. Snowed in, in July.

35. Public transport strikes. For a whole freaking month

36. I broke my glasses and couldn’t get them to stay back together in one piece. Without my glasses I don’t have a hope of even recognizing faces, let alone reading a screen.

37. I had to stop to let a cat into someone’s house. It wasn’t my cat. Wasn’t my house. But she was meowling at the door, so I knocked. Owner was confused at first as the cat slipped past her without her seeing, but then thankful because it was hot out. Haha.

38. “I was driving here and I was having this badass daydream about kiling zombies and shit. Drove right past the building and snapped out of it five minutes later and realized nothing looked familiar then did a 180 and raced back here.” Boss laughed, shook his head and told me not to worry about it.

39. [removed]

40. Two things.

    One, I fell asleep on the train and woke up in Luton

    Two, I was eating fried eggs, my budgie flew into the plate, got egg and ketchup on him, flew up into my hair and I had to wash egg and ketchup off myself and a small bird.

41. The plug for my washing machine melted from overheating, while washing my uniform, the night before my shift. We were lucky it didn’t start a fire.

42. “my neighbor’s dog was standing at the end of the driveway and wouldn’t get out of the way”

43. Left on time for work only to discover flat tire.

44. [removed]

45. As I was walking to the train station, I found a dog and needed to get it somewhere safe so I could locate it’s owner. I text a picture of myself with the dog to my boss. I called a friend that has a yard and she fostered the dog. I took the next train and was an hour and a half late. After much leg work, knocking doors, putting up flyers over the next couple days, I did end up finding it’s owner and returned her safely, yay!

46. “There was an iguana preventing me from closing my garage door.”

47. Cow got out. Happens quite often and I live in the country.

48. Sorry I was late, I was at an Obama fashion show