I (19M) have a really hard time socializing with others. This is mainly due to one issue that causes a lot of problems in several social situations. On one hand, I admit that I am a bad person – I am often selfish, paranoid, I lack empathy, I find it fun to look at the misfortunes of others, some have even told me that I have several sociopathic traits. On the other hand, I am aware of my awful personallity, so I try to hide it by trying to be nice and such, though, the problem is that my personallity often leaks out, and people can easily spot when I am being fake.
What should I do in this case? Since in both cases, I will have problems communicating and forming relationships with people.