My (30f) boyfriend (32M) is acting out of character.

This is a throw away account for obvious reasons. This is gunna be a longggggg one
I have been with my boyfriend for nearly two years. I’m not gunna say he’s the man of my dreams, we live a fairy tail life, and I can’t live without him. This is only because as a former serial dater, I’ve learned that this just isn’t what makes a relationship (for me).
What I will say is we have always had mutual love, respect, and make the decision to wake up every day and choose one another.
He was raised so great and is one of the kindest, most genuine, giving, and respectful people I know. However, lately I feel he’s been acting poorly occasionally.
We started couples therapy in march because our communication skills as separate individuals aren’t the best causing it to be not great as a couple but I will say it’s really been improving our communication and overall our relationship. I was also diagnosed with PMDD around the same time. If you don’t know much about Premenstrual dysmorphic disorder it’s a horrible diagnosis (think PMS on crack) that also can fully disconnect you from everyone and everything around you.
For background my boyfriend is outgoing, loved by everyone, and can make friends with a brick wall. As a result we are committed to a lottttt of events. I’m a more guarded, get socially exhausted quicker, and while most it’s an internal block struggle with fitting in. PMDD makes that worse and even when I’m not in a phase the mental remnants take time to get over. Additionally, I’ve drastically decreased the amount of drinking i do or how drunk I get.
Anyways my real hurt/problem has started I would say about a 3 weeks/ a month ago. I’ll try to be swift.
It started when I started packing to move to his place and I told him I may need his help. He told me that of course if it came down to it he would help me but I really had been giving it plenty of time to do it myself. I called him out on it and he said it stemmed from a frustration of he feels like sometimes I ask him to do things without trying it. Fair enough I do want to work on that and he apologized.
We always knew he would have a bach party the weekend after I moved in but then a work trip got planned and he was gunna be gone the whole week. Also fair because he cannot control that but of course it was a source of frustration for me.
We also knew that he had a huge important work gala the night I moved in. Again frustrating but this is truly something so important to him and I support him. So at the end of the day we only have Sunday together after a huge change. Again, life happens not a big deal.
What frustrates me is his friend also had a graduation party that night and he of course said we have to go after the gala. Annoying but fine I say I agree but I want to go home by 1230 it’ll have been a long day and we have plans the next day. He agrees.
The day before I move in we get in a spat because he asks if I come to his soccer game on Sunday if we could go. I said I would really appreciate it if you didn’t go… I’m annoyed I even have to say that considering the huge life change that’s occurring and him leaving the following day. I’m trying to breathe a little to calm down and he starts objecting and I raised my voice saying I was trying to calm down. Rightfully he got mad at the yelling. I apologized but his issue was that he felt it was shut down with no discussion and his opinion didn’t matter.
Fast forward to that day, he gets the most hammered I’ve ever seen him. He’s fine at the event but also drinking a lot it’s also getting later and later and he doesn’t want to leave for his friends party yet I don’t object because it’s his time. Eventually we get there at 1140 and he rolls in and doesn’t tell his friends we’re there for a short while. Whatever 1230 rolls around he hasn’t finished his drink I say finish up we’re going when you’re done. Seconds later a friend hands him a shot but they don’t pass it off securely and it gets spilled on me.
I reallyyyy don’t care but now I really wanna go home. He’s in a shame storm so he orders the uber. He’s barely coherent and can’t remember he ordered one so I’m figuring everything out. As a result it looks like I’m annoyed and dragging my boyfriend out of the bar because he never told people we planned on leaving at 1230.
We get home, he can’t remember he ordered food, he’s babbling, and I take us both to bed. Fast forward to the middle of the night I get up to pee and he threw up on the fricking floor and in the bathroom. I went straight back to bed. He is neverrrr like this. I’m annoyed but he wakes up in the morning apologizes, cleans it up, and had a really sweet day planned for me. The only thing that annoyed me is he kept complaining about being hungover before our planned workout I told him to cut it out.
Then, he has a work event (same friends as the graduation party) and he said he’s going out with friends after. Perfectly normal for us, no worries we have separate lives on top of ours. I invite my mom to come down and grab drinks with me. He tells me he’d prefer if my mom didn’t stay because he didn’t really want her to see him that drunk. My moms 70 and the drives 1.5 hrs. It’s not a guarantee she’s stay but that pissed me off. I said I’ll try and push one way but if she wants to stay I’m not gunna say no. Btw. She tells me she might stay.
Finally, the thing that cracked my heart open was on Saturday we were out with MY friends and yes he was good with them he loves them and he was engaged. We had been drinking. But occasionally he would pick up his phone and be reading through a mass amount of his friends snapchat group and was laughing at it. I asked him to please put his phone away he so out of character mumbled under his breath how fucking stupid that was. He’s always treated me with respect that killed me. Then an hour later he picks it up again and is on it and I say to him quietly “you’re the only one on your phone please stop” he lightly tossed the phone on the table and I was like we can talk about it later and he aggressively was like yeah we will. Again heart broken.
Yesterday our parents met and I just needed to breathe for a day but today I discussed it with him. I told him that he hurt me more than he ever has and he agreed that his behavior was unacceptable but again he feels like it’s stemming from him “losing control” and their not even being a convo. I’m frustrated because we really do healthily have our own lives and aren’t codependent but I want to work on that feeling. I also told him how incredibly rude it was for him to stay he’d prefer my mom would not stay over and to imagine if that was his parents. I also told him the last time he was drinking with this group he had zero control so him not wanting my mom to “see him like that” raised immediate red flags for me and his drinking. He told me he had no counter points and I was right and he would reel it in.
I’m a little lost on what to do. I am noticing a pattern in his behavior and I ask you reddit if there’s something I can do to remedy this and to help fix it. How would you proceed with this if it’s your partner?
TL;DR: I’ve been with my boyfriend for two years. He’s an all around wonderful person but has been acting out lately in ways that feel immature and rude to me. We’re in couples therapy because we aren’t very communicative individuals. I want to know how to broach and remedy the subject and what you would do with your partner.