I’m a 57 yo male. My wife is 55. Good healthy relationship. Over the past few years and my own health issues, my drive has really gone down. So sex became less and less. When we did, I always made sure she came, at least usually twice…starting with fingering and talking.
Recently through many tests for various issues, I was told I had low testosterone and started injections. Now I’m like my 25 yo self! Always ready! All day! Go to bed horny. Wake up in the middle of the night wanting to jump her. And great morning wood!
Now… she is on some treatment that, as per her words, have made her numb down there. Fingering doesn’t work. Toys do nothing—using just regular dildos and vibrators. I thought maybe used too much lube, nope…nadda… and she knows, as I have told her, I will do anything she wants and/or needs to get her there.
She is still very accommodating saying she loves me and wants to please me and make me cum, but she can’t cum…so she just kinda goes through the motions.
The problem… I feel like she is just being used as a cum-dump…. While it sounds good, part of me getting off is getting her off. I’ve never been in this position and don’t like her not feeling anything. I told her she needs to talk to the dr so we can fix this…whatever the treatment is that is causing it. And she going to do that soon…
Not sure if I’m looking for input and suggestions, or just needed to vent. Either way, thanks for letting me get this off my chest!
2 comments
That is an incredibly tough situation, OP. I am so sorry. That said, I love how it sounds like you both are talking to each other. Whatever resolution you find, it will come from this healthy ongoing dialogue.
Perhaps more info describing the treatment your partner is on could elicit specific suggestions?
I would encourage her to talk to her gynecologist. As we women age, our hormones are also all wacky. Depending if she’s peri-menopausal or through it there are many options for hormone replacement therapy for us too. Not only estrogen, but testosterone and progesterone as well.
And if her gynecologist isn’t supportive, I highly suggest she seek out a different one. I switched offices a few years ago to an all-female practice and have found they ask about sexual health in a much more open way and offered up many more options than my old practice did.