So to begin, I 25F and my 26M have been together for almost 3 years. We’ve talked about exes and past relationships but I haven’t told him about the first time I fell in love. So let me tell you.
I was 15, and I had a friend, let’s call her Nora. Nora 16F had a boyfriend, let’s call him Derek 16M. Nora and Derek met online and they had been talking for a few months. Nora introduced me to Derek (online) and we began talking. Nora and I lived across the globe, so we would always just call and talk to Derek.
Spoiler alert: Derek is a catfish. But Derek did not present like one. Derek had pictures and videos with friends, friends who commented and friends with their own profiles and pictures and hundreds of interactions with a bunch people. Derek had a brother who had pictures with derek and derek’s friends and parents and everything. Derek had exes and girls who commented and messaged him. Derek seemed real. Who derek really is is yet to come in this post, stay tuned. Another spoiler: It’s not an old man.
After almost a year of being friends with Derek, he and I entered into a long distance relationship **None of our interactions were sexual** . He and I talked day and night, exchanged pictures and had phone calls- but never video. I fell in love with derek. Pure and innocent love. After half a year of dating Derek, I find out that Derek is not real. Derek is a 15 year old girl from Canada. Let’s call her Mandy. Mandy and her friends created dozens and dozens of facebook profiles based on real people and their real friends and family and played some sorta sims/ make believe game. They’d chat with each other via these fake profiles, they’d post pictures the actual people were posting and interact with them as if they were real. It was just a group of teenage girls having a weird querky hobby. Mandy and her friends revealed their true identities to me. Derek/Mandy told me all of this and how they had been active on these profiles for a few years. Derek was fake and I was heartbroken. I grieved Derek. Mandy told me she was sorry and she never intended to hurt me or Nora or even the previous girl Derek catfished. Mandy and her friends were nice and they genuinely didn’t seem malicious. I did develop a lot of trust issues after but that’s besides the point.
It’s a secret that I find embarassing and only my closest friends know. Do I tell my now boyfriend- who I am in a very serious relationship with about Derek?
3 comments
I think that it’s normal to not speak up about everything to your guy, more so since I don’t think keeping this from him would harm your relationship. But if you’re comfortable enough to share it, off you go, I guess? 😅
Ps. I’m sorry about what you had to go through. These girls should probably have done something better with their time.
They didn’t seem malicious? That is 100% malicious! Everything they did was with the intent to lie and deceive not only you but other people for a long period of time! And they went to great lengths to deceive you! They did this on purpose, it was not an accident and they kept doing it over and over.
You don’t owe him the information, but in an ideal relationship, you would be safe to share this information.