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Reverse cowgirl always pleases I’m thinking. You can control smooth motions or amazing grinds.
Having same problem here being a guy. If you are facing the guy then holding penis erect and then sitting and sliding it in helps then moving gently up and down or maybe press your body against his chest and raise your ass a bit higher so let him do the strokes slowly until one of you cums. Latter works perfect for me.
Have you tried grinding more than lifting up?