Books on socializing

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1. My honest recommendation is to forget about books on socializing and *just start socialising* instead. You can not learn this from a book.

   It is not a theoretical concept you can try and learn step for step, people **will** notice you are not authentic and sincere. It might get you through shallow social interactions but you will not get genuine realtions of any kind out of this.

   I, for example, once had a supervisor at work who I am 100% sure read the book you’ve mentioned (or any other generic guide on the topic). Making sure to *always* adress people with their firstname and saying thank you for literally *anything*. “Hey, FlowerBuffPowerPuff, is there still paper in the printer?” – “Yes” – “Thank you very much for your help, FlowerBuffPowerPuff”. What I mean is a bit hard to grasp in writing, I hope one gets the gist. It’s just painfully obvious, the atmosphere is somewhat eary and off.

   Now that wasn’t all too helpful with your actual issue at point and you will wonder what exactly I mean when I write “just start socialising”. To be honest – exactly this. Talk to people. More. It is a skill you need actual practice in. Go to the cashier instead of a self checkout, for example. Not to find the love of your life or best friend out of them but just to talk and interact. I am not even telling you to awkward smalltalk about the wheater or something. Just the regular talk you have with a cashier is all you need in the beginning. Routine is king. Getting used to those situations is.

   Force yourself into interactions with other people – where reasonable of course – at any time your subconcious is screaming at you not to and run away instead. It adds up. You get used to it. And most of it all, those interactions will be authentic as you’re going in blind. Without a plan to win people over or have the conversation rattled down like a play.

   You will not find any more advice than what I’ve wrote in those books. Just spread out over hundreds of pages. *Each*. If those books worked, they wouldn’t exist. Atleast not in the volume you find them in.