For most of the guys I talk to, being honest about not being interested (politely) gets me more crap than just ghosting someone. It’s almost as if people prefer to just be ghosted than to have someone tell them they aren’t interested. It’s weird.
Edit: I didn’t say I ghost people. I said guys just can’t handle even being told politely I’m not interested and I don’t think I should have to take their garbage response when I did my part and just told them instead of ghosting.
7 comments
I’m not sure what your post has to do with your title. It seems like in both situations, you’re not interested.
That’s not about finding success in dating. That’s about dealing with less shitty feedback.
Ghosting inherently leads to not dealing with the scariness of being honest. Some people respond horribly to honesty, I get it. But ghosting is about you, not them. Do whatever you want but don’t try to use this as a premise for doing so.
Edit: I want to be clear that I understand why ghosting exists. Some people handle rejection horribly. I get it. It still doesn’t make it ok to avoid being an adult where possible.
the men who give you crap for not being interested are low-life scum bags. those of us who accept it gracefully are gentlemen, and we appreciate your honesty.
Please dont be insensitive to the gentlemen for the sake of the scum-bags.
Agree with all comments so far. They aren’t really men. They are little, emotional boys, who feel some sort of entitlement for all women they are supposedly selecting (Lmao!!!) to accept their advances. When they don’t get their way, they can’t deal. On the flip, it’s perfectly fine for them to be assholes to a girl who might weigh a couple of extra lbs, or not be absolutely porn star hot. They’re pretty rotten and hurtful then. They can dish it; but they cannot take it!
So nope. Ladies you don’t owe them anything. If you turn down their advances politely, they should respect that. It’s simple. Dating/meeting people shouldn’t be a bloodbath. It’s ridiculous some of the shit going on…
Cause you hurt their fragile male egos. Just ghost. If they bug you and ask you why you’re not responding oh well. You dont owe them shit. Being honest in dating is everything. Like the most important thing.
It is fucked up.
Ghosting is definitely far worse on other person’s mental health (according to studies), but there are some guys who don’t take no for an answer.
There is no realistic way to gauge how will the guy react, so girls often ghost, which ends up hurting “okay” guys more.
I think its generally more safe for women to ust ghost men who are not a good fit.
Don’t ghost. Be honest. If they get weird after that, then ghost.