So I (F23) recently started talking to my gym crush (m30). I’ve been crushing on him for months now and felt the same vibe back a little bit from him and decided to go up and introduce myself. Prior to introducing myself, we’d make eye contact nonstop. It went super well and he seemed excited that I came up and talked to him. The next time I saw him, he came up and said hi and we stood and chatted for close to an entire hour about everything under the sun.
I’ve been seeing him pretty regularly for a couple weeks now at the gym and we talk each time. It varies whether it’s him that approaches me or vice versa, but each time we talk for quite awhile. It’s even gotten to a point where I’ve noticed him linger around after his workout if I’m not finished lifting yet. He’ll always come up before he leaves to talk and say goodbye.
When we talk, it feels like pretty standard conversation. He’s not too flirty or direct with me. There’s some things he’s said that seems like maybe he’s hinting at something, but I can’t read him. I cannot tell if maybe he’s just shy, trying to be respectful, or is just not interested in me like that. But he hasn’t asked for my number or any social media, or to make any plans to see each other outside of the gym. Like I said, it’s been probably about 4 weeks now of us regularly chatting for lengthy periods of time at the gym. He’ll always ask what I’m doing after the gym or what my plans are for the week, but it will never go any further than that.
I’m just confused as to why he would seek me out and remember the smallest details about me if he wasn’t interested in me. I thought he was into me, but now I’m just confused. If he wanted to just be gym friends, why would he talk to me for 20+ minutes each day he sees me? Im friends with a few guys at my gym and none of them are like this; pretty simple convo and it’s clear that there’s no romantic interest with them. Am I overthinking this?
5 comments
He’s just talking to you, or enjoying attention from a younger girl. Also, he might have gf or be married.
Just ask him out tbh, worst he says is no and then you still have a great friend. He might not know for sure that you’re interested, best thing to do is be direct!! Best of luck OP!
One of the biggest, if not the biggest, complaint from women about men at the gym is being approached by them when they’re just there to work out. So why would you expect him to ask you out ? On top of that, I don’t see you asking him out, asking for his socials or planning something outside the gym with him either.
You either put your big girl pants and ask him out. Or you realise he may or may not feel comfortable enough to ask you out at the gym.
Currently unknown since he’s friendly, but usually your gut should tell you pretty strongly. But showing interest can potentially change things, so it’s fine to be obvious about it if you like him and if he’s open to it he’ll go for it. Be obvious that you like him, worst case happens just keep the ending civil.
Steps:
1 eye contact…
2 conversation…
3 body contact: try to touch him a little, his arm, hands, shoulder, back, etc. (Dont go overboard) He may touch you back or may start joking with more physical contact.