I have a crush on my friend. And now my friend with benifits. Im just curious if i lost my virginty. I was also naked and he also rubbed it agianst me. Did i lose my virginity?

11 comments

  1. More info: he finished in my mouth (i swallowed) and i did not finish ( but really liked it)

  2. Technically, no. Losing your virginity means penetration. I still think the concept of virginity is a relic of old times where women’s bodies were controlled by old men though.

  4. Virginity is entirely a social construct. Depending on your inclinations, you may consider yourself as having lost your oral virginity. Or just still class yourself as a virgin because you haven’t had PIV (penis in vagina) sex yet. Heck, there are a lot of people out there that don’t think anal sex counts as losing their virginity, enough that its made fun of in [pop culture.](https://youtu.be/j8ZF_R_j0OY) Warning offensive and NSFW.

    A lot of folks don’t consider it sex if the hymen is still intact, but some women have incredibly flexible hymen, one lady gave _ birth_ and still had an intact hymen. And like 50% of gal’s have their hymen naturally dilate or tear way before penetrative sex.

    Important thing is to treat yourself right and care for yourself, learn and know your own boundaries.

    If you want to talk religion or safe practices and the like, feel free to ask any questions.

  5. The concept of virginity is definitely weird. Who cares? You didn’t lose anything. You gained a new experience and learned more about yourself. That is all that matters.

    Are you concerned about whether or not you have done something you shouldn’t? Or whether this will impact how others see you? Those are other questions, and it’s hard to know what exactly you are asking when you wonder if you have lost your virginity. What is it you are trying to find out?

  8. The idea of virginity is very heteronormative (determined based on straight sex – hence all these comments about PIV sex) and outdated.

    For gay people what is considered “sex” is very different than straight people.

    When I was younger and believed I was straight I would have said you were still a virgin. But now that I am older and more experienced, and Bi, I would say this counts as sex.

    It’s really up to you. For me any sexually activity with the intention of climax for either party I would call sex. I think lots of straight people think this way these days too, but it’s always been more complicated for the gays.

    Also though I don’t think virginity matters one way or the other, but you said you were curious so that’s my input.

    And since you asked about condoms – YES USE CONDOMS! I think lots of people don’t use condoms for oral sex but I actually got herpes this way! If you start having anal sex transmission rates are higher for Anal sex then vaginal because there is no self lubrication so there are mire micro tears with anal sex (which increases transmission rates) – so it is really important to use condoms for anal Especially!

    You don’t say your age but you say your a teenager and your just way too young to risk an STI – if you get an STI it will impact your ability to get any future sexual partners so keep that in mind.

  11. If you started a relationship with a guy who told you he was a virgin but you later found out he had done what you did with your friend, would you think he had lied to you?

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