I’ve had several opportunities to sleep with someone, but every time without fail, I back out bc my nerves get to me and I feel scared. Not because sex is something I don’t want, it’s mostly bc I haven’t done it before (one experience but no penetration, and it was w a friend so it felt safer), and also bc I’m scared I’ll be super disappointing or awkward. It sounds like a nightmare to be getting into it, realizing I have no idea what I’m doing, and get some frustrated response/question from the other person.
I don’t care too much abt the “virginity” label tbh, it’s more the fact that I feel like I’m ready and willing to sleep w someone, yet I keep freaking out last second.
I’m 18M if that helps
3 comments
Have the mindset of Jacques Cousteau…go explore! Seriously, dont put all this pressure on yourself. Even the most experinced of us fuck it all up (see what I did there!) sometimes! Be safe and enjoy yourself!
Congratulations on being normal. Communication with your partner is absolutely critical for a positive sexual experience. Go slow, explore, enjoy. Ask your partner what they enjoy and start there. Explore everything you can. Respect any boundaries. Always keep the communication flowing. Talk about birth control. Make sure you both have up to date STI test results including HSV2.
Make sure you have explict consent.
Sex is a skill that you need to learn. We are born with animalistic instincts for reproduction. We gave to learn how to give and receive pleasure.
Have fun. Be safe. Explore with all of your senses.
You will only overcome the fear and inexperience by having sex.
Is the friend still available? If he is talk to him about what you want to do. He won’t be disappointed.
If you want you could explore yourself before being with someone else.
Relax, and do what you want.