My current most egregious social problem is that I have no idea what to talk about when starting a conversation. I can ask the most basic questions like “How’s it going” or “What are you doing?” and the like, but as soon as those are answered (usually very curtly), I freeze and panick about what to say and generally just end up not saying anything. I don’t actually have a problem with approaching people, but I have a big problem with not knowing what to say and then keep it going after I’ve approached them. Like, a scenario for example, I’m sitting next to a guy or a girl waiting for a bus and I want to have a nice conversation before the bus arrives. I have no problem to open my mouth and say something about the weather or how long it takes the bus to arrive, but after that initial burst, I clamp my jaw shut and I don’t say anything, because I don’t know what else I could say. I was thinking about sitting down and writing down all the questions I could ask beforehand and then memorising them. Does anyone have any other advice or any examples for the questions? I’d much appreciate it.
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FORD
Family – kids, parents, loved ones, are they nearby, when did you see them last, when’s the next time etc etc
Occupation – what do you do? That’s interesting, I always wondered about (insert question), how long have you been doing it? Who are the rock stars in your industry? Etc etc
Recreation – What do you do for fun? What was the last adventure you went on? Did you travel to…
Dreams – If money were no object what would you do? Have you ever wanted to…? Etc
These all reinforce each other, but you don’t have to go into every topic. The key is to ask deeper questions that are not small talk, and to share your answers too, so it doesn’t feel like an inquisition.