So I’ll try and keep this as short as possible:
I (34M) met this woman (33F) via a Facebook group meant for dating. We met up IRL pretty quickly and had a nice first date (in my eyes). We kept texting and talking throughout the week and Last night finally met again and went to see a movie at the local Cinema.
So far, things are looking good in my eyes. She seems nice, enthusiastic and in general someone that I am attracted to. So during the date we start holding hands and having these light touches and I was pretty much getting a lot of vibes that a kiss would be appropriate.
So after the movie, we walk outside and the big moment finally arrives…. and to be blunt, it just sucked.
She gave me this really weird peck, like she is my aunt giving me a hello/goodbye kiss and not like someone who wants to be romantically involved with me. There was zero passion. I tried to go in for a second (thinking maybe it was just a weird one-off mistake) but the same thing happened. She even told me that “She doesn’t french kiss” (which was weird because I never tried to do that to begin with) but that “she really liked it”….
To be honest, this pretty much turned me off, big time. I want passion and desire when I am dating someone… and this is not it. But I am also thinking that maybe she was super nervous and that was what made her behave like that. Also its been a long time that I have been on two successful dates like these and so I don’t want to throw it away over something that might be fixable.
So what should I do – give her another chance or to move on?
3 comments
be patient, she might kiss you the way you want later
Talk to her about it. To me the issue isn’t really about the experience of the kiss, but this specifically.
> “She doesn’t french kiss”
This sounds a bit crazy to me. Like to never kiss using any tongue ever? Like you say this is how an aunt would kiss you not a romantic partner. I can see at least two possible explanations here. One is that there is something weird (or just an insecurity) going on with her mouth/tongue, in which case thats perfectly fine and understandable and you. should talk it out with her to see if thats a dealbreaker for you or something you can work out together.
The other possible idea would be that she is generally a bit repressed or has (what I would consider) a weird approach to physical intimacy. So this could be a warning sign that you are not matched up sexually at all. Again the only worthwhile approach here would be to try to talk it out with her. Even if she is more on the repressed side than you right now doesn’t mean it has to be that way forever.
And I guess a third option is just a miscommunication and she doesn’t mean she never french kisses just that she takes it more slowly.
Regardless I think the solution is definitely communication over just moving on. Just say that you really like her and want to continue seeing her but you are a bit worried when she says “She doesn’t french kiss” because physical intimacy is important to you and ask her if she wants to talk about it.
At that age. Walk away lol