My bf (29M) and I (26F) have been together for about a year. He has been very supportive and sweet to me. I struggle with jealousy issues and my self esteem. It’s always been something I have struggled with. The other day we were talking and I had asked him if he had ever had a hookup and he said yes. I asked him for details about it and he said he had a college drunk hookup when he was in college and 23 years old. He said he met a girl at a party and they hit it off, had drinks, and then they hooked up. It was his only hookup and he said he wasn’t really interested in it afterward. I got very triggered by this hookup because there was alcohol involved. I immediately assumed that because there was alcohol involved that he has possibly r@ped the girl. He got very upset when I accused him of this and said that he never thought I’d think those things of him. I don’t even know why I thought that about him. He has never forced me to do anything I don’t want to do and is very sweet and comforting when we have sex. I only assumed that he possibly r@ped her because they had been drinking and what if she was more drunk and didn’t actually want to do so. My bf said they were both drinking and she was also participating and they hooked up. My bf has never been the kind of “dude” that is a misogynistic or anything like that. I’m wondering if I was too harsh to accuse him of that just because there was alcohol involved and the thing with consent and all. I keep asking him the same question if he did and he keeps saying no and that he would never do anything like that. I don’t have any evidence other than just thinking that could’ve happened and I don’t know about it.
How do I move past this?
5 comments
Do you think they both raped each other if they were both doing the same thing?
Whatt??!?!?! Why would you ever tell someone that they might have rape someone. Especially a SO.
I’m hoping this is fake, cause you’re coming off as a sexist AH.
I see you’re still unhinged. And still not mentally healthy enough to be in an adult relationship.
Please let this guy go. He doesn’t deserve to be treated like this.
Yes you were harsh, idk if you’d even call it harsh. Why do you assume that because there was alcohol some kind of assault took place? Nothing he said was indicative of assault. Ofc you’d be mortified if someone accused you of assault with 0 prompting