Hi guys,
Any advice or point of views would be appreciated, im not sure how to feel about this but in the past few months we (me (25) and gf (26)) have started being annoyed by the fact that everything always seems to be about my brother’s life (29m and 27f). It’s always their home, their dogs, and soon to be their new baby as they’ll be making announcements soon.
We did a vacation trip lately that sort of reinforced this view since visiting family we felt like this again when reuniting with family that lives abroad (this happens not only in our immediate family).
We thought we would talk to them / family about this since it makes us feel like we are spectators / not main characters in our own life when we are at gatherings with them being also present. We dont seem to have any issues interacting with my family when they are not present. But with the news of them having a baby soon we feel it would be disresctfull to bring it up now and we can’t find any time or way to bring this up without making an issue about it.
I am at a loss, I feel like I have to chose between distancing myself from events with them and or my own hapiness.
Can you please give advice on how to handle this
tl;Dr : me and gf are sick of feeling like spectators at family events when big bro and his gf are present
3 comments
I honestly know how you feel because that’s my life where everything is about my little bro. Everything about what he’s doing and always making sure he’s okay but no one caring about me. The only thing I can advise is to state how you feel and see what they say about that. It could be they don’t realize or do. But if they don’t care much then it’s normal to distance yourself from events for your happiness
Would I be correct in assuming that no one in the family ever thought your brother would accomplish anything in his lifetime?
Maybe your brother’s life is just more interesting? Maybe they’re just more engaging in conversation? What’s interesting about your life? Do you have a nice home and a baby? Whenever I go to big family gatherings, there’s people I click with, and people I don’t, no big deal.