So recently my wife has been wearing slightly more revealing bikinis when she tans, and it’s got me thinking about how hot she would look in lingerie. She’s never owned any as long as we’ve been together. I know she has some body image issue (don’t we all?) so I don’t know if that’s the reason.
So my question is, am I supposed to be the one to buy it for her? I don’t really know how sizing and stuff works and I’d want it to be something SHE feels sexy in. Do ask her to buy some? Just try to bring it naturally? Help me Reddit!
35 comments
Do it together!
Take her shopping!
Do it together. It’s super hot that way.
You don’t want to buy too big or small. Doing it together is the best way. Similar to sex toys.
While doing it together as others have suggested is the best way, there are a lot of one-size-fits-most costumes, lingerie, and sexy swimwear you can buy for her online or in stores as long as you have a ballpark idea of her size. Many aren’t expensive at all – have fun with it by having a fashion show to see what fits and looks good.
You can totally buy something for her— but you probably want to test the waters before going whole hog.
Do you know her sizes? If not you might want to try something that comes in S/M/L/etc that has a hope of working in those sizes (ie a sexy chemise/nightgown/teddy and absolutely not a bra).
Try to find something you’d think she’d like and feel sexy in. Also— if she would be annoyed at you spending $700 on three strips of silk then find something more reasonably priced. Stay off Amazon/AliExpress/Etsy unless you are really on a budget— there is a lot of really cheap and poorly fitted stuff there.
At the cost of surprise (worth it), you could talk to her about it and if she is receptive browse for items together in person or on the internet.
A subreddit you might find useful to read is r/lingerieaddiction — it is focused on women buying themselves lingerie but lots of good links for those of us who buy lingerie for women.
Just look at the tags of her underwear and bra to get the size. This isn’t rocket science, people.
Edit: for people pointing out sizes can vary from brand to brand, etc., sure, but for something like a lacy Teddy or a thong, the sizes aren’t really too customized. This isn’t going to be her everyday bra that needs to fit perfect – it’s just going to be worn a few mins before it’s being peeled right back off her body! 😉
Ask for her sizes and surprise her imo
This is a very sweet question.
My friend: tell her “you look incredible in your lingerie. I’d love to get you more. Would you like to go shopping for it together?”
Voila. Now you have something to do *as a couple*.
(This also works for sex toys!)
Go together or ask her and she goes. There’s no way my partner could find the right fit for me. I have to try everything in the store.
First of all, if she does tanning beds and not spray tans, she should stop doing that.
Second, do it together. She finds out what you like, you find out what she likes. Everybody’s happy. My husband is into plaid skirts. Who knew? Fun discoveries all around.
Sometimes she does, sometimes i do. Other times together. It should be fun!
My husband wanted to see me in cuter panties. We went to the mall one day randomly and passed a Victoria’s Secret and he asked to go in. Shopping for sexy clothes together was really fun. Especially cause we don’t always agree on what’s sexy 😂 so it was good to get something he def liked.
I personally like just buying mine only because I know what I would fit in. I have size L boobs but wear size S items.
So I love it when my husband gets me gift cards or just hands me the visa or tells me to take my time coming home after work to go get something sexy for tonight 😉
But in the past we went onto a sex toy website and picked things out for each other for a surprise and my husband got me a tight revealing bodysuit/lingerie
It was fun to see what he thought I would look sexy in
i would start small! maybe buy her a couple bikinis for her to wear tanning to perhaps start the conversation about those kind of things. lingerie is difficult to buy as a surprise if you don’t already know her sizes! ideally it would be done by her or together, but that could be overwhelming for someone who hasn’t really done it before.
We both do … we both enjoy them
As someone else has mentioned, look at her bra size and panty size, and he’ll, even her dress size if she has any. I’d go with something like a body stocking or teddy. Something that doesn’t have to be an exact fit.
Iv always brought them for my ex-wife and the other girlfriends iv been out with . The main thing about lingerie , a sexy nickers and bra set is the way they feel when their wearing them . Gorgeous and sexy
*”I LOVE the way you look in that bikini. Every time I see you in it, I immediately want to help you out of it.”*
Well. Something like that, anyway.
She has some body image issues. And you’ve seen her wear something that got your mind racing. *Tell her*. Compliment her.
If you are super-aware of her bra size (here, you also have to take model into account. Some models are more size-complicated than others) and what size panties she wears, sure. You can buy her some.
But, uh. My wife wears these quite expensive bras (around $200 apiece) because she *needs* a good fit. I wouldn’t even consider buying for her without having her trying it on first. It just ain’t happening.
Instead, I either tag along and leave my card with the store clerk and discretely tell her my budget.
Or, buy my wife a gift card and encourage her to show me what she got, when she gets back home again.
Seriously. Just tell her that you enjoyed seeing her in that bikini. Tell her that you want to see her in that OFTEN (and she might connect the dots herself and wear it sometime when she wants to seduce…) and once you have warmed her up to THAT thought a bit, tell her that you really want to bring her out shopping underwear that she wants to be seen in.
I’ll do it
Go shopping together! It’s a lot of fun!
Personally when we go shopping together I pay, but that might not be everyone’s preference when it comes to their own relationships and dynamics.
Once you get a feel for what she likes, you can always buy her some and surprise her with it. But I highly recommend going together to start
You can try buying her something and see how she reacts. You’re not *supposed* to buy her anything, but you can, if you like
It’s totaly okay and lovely to buy her some as a gift. And totaly a normal goft between couples. But ask her first. If she want any? If she would be comfortable with you buying her some? Her size what she likes ect. As she is a women who dosnt wear sexy underwear and has some body issues I wouldn’t do it without having a conversation with her first, as her insecurities and overthinking mind could take it the wrong way. And it’s better to have that conversation first anyway.
This is so sweet. I would bring it up to her like others suggested. “You look fabulous in your bikinis, I was wondering if you would like to shop around for lingerie. We can go together or whatever makes you feel comfortable.”
It’s so nice to see a post on here like this 🙂
I had my bridal trousseau with beautiful lingerie but it was all very ‘sweet’ and one year my husband gave me a gorgeous 5 piece set to wear under my clothes while we went to dinner and then had a marvelous night of debauchery at home.
He told me how he could not wait to see me in it (I dressed without him present) and was vocal about my body in it and it was a major turn on for me to have him so revved up by the very idea. I started to buy lots more after that!
We do shop together sometimes-but I prefer either his choosing for me or my surprising him. It’s far more fun for us that way.
Is it weird my partner never mentions anything of this? No interest in seeing my in lingerine or underwear or bras. Damn, it makes me feel so unattractive
I would usually ask my ex’s friends. Not really as a favor but run it by them, show you’re taking an interest in that and see if maybe you can convince them to take your girl shopping. It’s best not to buy it yourself since even the best lingerie needs to be on the appropriate body.
I measured my girlfriend’s clothing measurements, keep it on my phone. If something strikes my eye, I can figure out her size. I usually let her drive the lingerie since that’s so personal, but if the right piece caught my eye I’d feel comfortable trying it.
My Facebook ads are 50 percent women’s lingerie and swimwear, and I’m a guy.
Honestly, I like to buy my own. That way I can find things I am comfortable wearing that are the most flattering. My husband loves the things I buy, but he would pick out things I would look bad in. I would hate shopping for it with him.
I love when my husband buys it!!! I hate choosing. Obviously I wear it for him not for me, and as far as having body image issue + not wanting to disappoint it’s though! I’m more of a all nude fan.
What worked for him is order a few size on Amazon and return what doesn’t fit.
For fancier brand, I’ll usually do it myself. But I never did in the beginning – I only was comfortable when he showed me a little of what he liked.
We do it together. Usually he’ll send me 4-5 links to stuff and then we’ll look at it together, choose one or two and order those. That way we get a size that should fit and we don’t end up with something that I have zero interest in wearing.
Oh please buy it for her! As someone who usually only buys her own; it would be so hot to have my partner pick something out for me!
Bring it up to her and suggest doing it together. Or suggest visiting a sex store and nonchalantly visit the lingerie area together and tell her you’d love to see her in one of these and offer to buy it. Tell her to surprise you with her choice and walk away (unless there’s a specific look you want to see her in of course then make suggestions of like a top 3). It might unlock something new and exciting for y’all.
When I first met my fiancée she had never worn any before. I told her I’d love to see her in some and now she surprises me with something new 1-2x monthly. Her goal now is to have an entire closet of lingerie. She buys most of them now, but I’ll surprise her from time to time too.
Not sure where You live but We have Lovers Lane out here and they have some nice lingerie there, or You can go online and try Frederick’s Of Hollywood.
I took her shopping for it. So, together.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 6 years, and we go to the store together but he pays 🙂