I (30f)feel kinda bad for my partner (32m) as despite him not having a low libido he’d still like to have that kind of intamcy. I’m at a loss now. If he initiates I try to get into it but when you’re not horny it’s meh. Rub all the sensitive bits and it just feels meh if I’m not horny. It doesn’t seem like a deal breaker for him but I worry one day it might be. Together 8 years.
I tried watching porn and and sorts of different types, see if anything turned me on, nope. Tried masturbating more. Tried putting more effort into my appearance to see if that would help. I have no kinks or fantasies. I tried reading erotica. The books are just cringe, I struggle to enjoy anything that’s not horror really. I tried fanfiction of TV characters I fancy. We have toys but, I dunno, the dildos don’t feel good and the vibrator only works if I feel horny, otherwise it tickles and feels awful.
Nothing feckin works! I’ve told my partner and he’s tried new little things to get me going and nithjbf works. I’m definitely attracted to him, I don’t get it.
4 comments
You can get your hormones checked by an easy blood test that your doctor can set up.
Are you on hormonal birth control, SSRI or beta blockers? All of those can kill your libido.
Some woman just have low Libido and that’s ok! You tried alot of things to try and help which is a positive but most importantly Is your partner expressing dismay? Are you able to meet his needs in other ways? (Oral sex, manual masterbation/hand job). Or is it more that he’s unhappy that you don’t get horny/enjoy sex like he does?
You are lucky. No bs
Sometimes hormone imbalances make people feel this way so it’s worth getting those checked. Birth control and antidepressants can also destroy libido