So I (M,33) have two small parrots that I love to death (a green cheek conure and a canary winged parakeet both about half way through their expected life cycles of 15-20 years and the CWP is mildly internet famous. I wish I was making that up lol)
They have apparently been the reason the last few ladies that I tried to start something SERIOUS AND LONG TERM with weren’t interested or backed out and it almost always followed the “do you have pets question”.
The birds seem to be winners with short term partners or anyone that just want to be friends.
Maybe most people don’t realize how much time their pets take up, or how annoying dogs and cats can be, or they aren’t giving them the time they actually need, but birds are not that different from dogs as far as the amount of time they require.
So, and not that I’d EVER ask a perspective long term partner to give up a pet, I don’t like cats and am indifferent to dogs and I don’t really want either in my life again but I’ve had both and would do my best to adjust for the right partner; but I’m getting the vibe that I’m expected to give up my pets that I care for as much as they care for their dogs or cats?
My brother’s fiancée has told me to do as much, so I do worry this may be the case.
This is broken thinking to me.
I’m in the process of getting a house and they will have their own room, they are bonded to me so no one else will have to or really will be allowed to be handling them, their clean up is not something I’d expect anyone else to take care of, and while they are loud it’s primarily during the day when no one is normally home and if they think someone is home they only do occasional flock calls.
Since it would be some time before I let anyone move in with me again anyway, I’m not sure why they are an issue.
Anyone else have this problem with their pets?
2 comments
I can answer from the opposite side and say yes, I’ve broken things off with someone because of their pets. She was probably the most awesome and beautiful person I’ve ever dated, but she had a dog. She had to take it with her everywhere and she wouldn’t come to my place unless she could bring it. It terrorized my cat and she insisted it had to be allowed to sleep on the bed (I don’t allow my cat in the bedroom). It wouldn’t sleep anywhere except in between us and it snored like hell all night. And of course when I went to her house I had to deal with the same. So I broke it off over a dog.
So yeah, pets can be a deal breaker for a lot of people. Just one of those things you have to accept and move on. You’ll eventually find someone who digs your pets as much as you do.
One girl I was trying to develop something with admitted she found my cat annoying and that constantly being around cat fur is kind of a deal breaker for ‘sanitary’ reasons..putting my experience aside, it can definitely be a deal breaker for some.
All you can do is communicate how your animals are bonded to you and work from there.
I will be honest and say a lot of birds are nonstop noise and I know that can be pressing for some. However if someone loves you truly, then they can hopefully look past things like that or maybe even you can help them to understand animal binding better.
Good luck !