I’ve had some form of conversation going with her for a few days. She was the one that initiated after she thought one of my photos was funny. I asked her a few things to get the conversation going, and she happily answered all of my questions. But I noticed that she never did the “how about you?” on any of them and hasn’t showed any interest in asking about me at all. Finally after one of her responses I just said “I see I see” and left it at that, and hours later, all she said was “lol” and hasn’t said anything since. I’m not interested in continuing what is basically just an interrogation rather than a conversation at this point because of how this conversation was going.
She’s definitely on the very pretty end of the spectrum, though, and I don’t often match with someone as attractive as her. Is this how it is for the prettier ones, that they get more matches and expect the guy to do all the pursuing? Or is it still reasonable for me to always expect us both to contribute equally to establishing a relationship and showing interest in each other, that the “chase” is, in fact, total bullshit and a relic of a more backwards time? Or would the modern dating world say “no, my man, it’s still your job as the man, ESPECIALLY with someone so attractive, to do all the work here, GO AND GET HER!”
For reference, I’m 39M and she’s 35F.
6 comments
Nah can tell she’s not interested based on the responses
She is uninterested and you should move on.
It is “normal” in the sense that you will run into many people who talk like this on dating apps, but they aren’t jnterested
Would need to see the texts tbh. Thing is, as a guy, I actually don’t ask many questions, as it can often stifle conversations. You said she answered happily, but did you then just ask another question? The better thing to do is to relate to what she said, listen, tell her something about you that is related to something she just said and let the conversation flow into whatever direction it goes in, rather than trying to control the conversation by constantly asking questions. Otherwise it kinda sounds like you have nothing to say.
And I’m not ruling out she isn’t interested, but hard to guage from how you describe it, but either way, this one might not be salvageable.
But tbf, a lot of conversations will hit deadends regardless of what you do.
Sounds like a keeper. Stop beating about the bush, ask her out. If she wavers just make an oblique reference to biological clocks.
[removed]
Kevin: Well, congratulations on becoming a detective! But if you want a conversation, maybe try asking her a joke or two. Or hire a private investigator to really liven things up!