I’ve been seeing this girl on ocassion and we’ve slept together in the past. We met up last week, and she said she couldn’t have sex due to some health issues. So instead, we had some foreplay- however during this she said I shouldn’t go down on her due to said issues. When I tried making her taste herself (which she usually loves), she shouldn’t taste herself for the same reason. She also generally seemed to be cautious about having her vagina near my penis (which we have never had an issue with in the past)

I did not press her for an answer, but now I’m wondering what the condition was? Do you think it was an STI, UTI etc.? How can I ask her without being overly intrusive.

5 comments

  1. We can’t tell you what it was.

    All we can tell you is that you can ask for an explanation when someone is acting squirrely like that.

  3. I think you should definitely try and talk with her about it. Not only for your safety but for hers as well. It’s hard to tell what it is, only she would know for sure. As for bringing it up, nicely let her know you care about her and her feelings and just want to continue providing her with a comfortable time. But for ease of mind for both of you she needs to least let you know. Also, for your safety and hers overall, it might be a good idea to both get tested. Even if you think/know you’re fine, it allows for the both of you to get confirmation that you are both safe.

  4. “I realize you may not want to go into detail, but being that I’m your sexual partner, I’d appreciate being told what is going on. Even if it’s a yeast infection, it can affect me too and I would appreciate being kept in the loop”.

    Did you two have std tests prior to sex? If she doesn’t tell you what’s going on, tell her you want to stop having sex until you both get tested and you want the two of you to show the results.

    Also, if it is a yeast infection or uti (doubtful since a uti is painful and she let you finger her), be kind. Don’t say something insensitive.

  5. I think you should always be concerned about anything that sounds like it could potentially jeopardise your health. If it’s an STI, you have a right to know, and she has a responsibility to disclose that to you.
    I’d definitely gently bring it up with her if I were you and just assure her there’s absolutely no judgment

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