I (24f) and my now ex (28m) had been dating for about more than 7 months before I found out he was using Tinder. I confronted him on the phone to which he confessed and that lead us to meet up within the next hour because I was freaking out. Once we got together, I was just checked out for the entire conversation as he was speaking. I couldn’t look at him or say anything besides a few questions I was curious about. He had to get back to work so he asked if it was okay if we both gave each other some space and I just nodded. Later that night I messaged him about breaking things off and it’s been three days since and he hasn’t gotten back to me. I would think he would acknowledge it at least. At first I was hoping he just needed some time to process his feelings, but I’m starting to believe things are going to end like this. Should I have waited to tell him that in person? I feel like I shouldn’t even feel bad for the way I react to what he did, however I can’t help but feel like I did something wrong too.
I still need to get my things from his place and I’m not even sure when that would be an appropriate time to ask because I don’t want to be the one to reach out to him again.
tldr: i broke up with my cheating boyfriend through text and he hasn’t replied back in 3 days.
20 comments
Why do people do these things over text?
Considering he cheated on you, it’s not so surprising that he wouldn’t bother replying to you once you were done. Focus on getting your things back if they are that important and be done with him completely.
Who gives a fuck about that guy. Don’t stress about being the one to react first. Just ask a friend to come with you and inform him about when you’re showing up to his house. Take your stuff and don’t look back.
You didn’t do anything wrong.
If someone wants to cheat, they will do.
Block his number and move on with your life.
You don’t owe him anything. It sucks to not get an acknowledgement but I think that’s it. Can you live without your stuff?
I’m guessing he’s trying to psyche you. Get someone else to get in contact with him about getting things you might have. Don’t write him. We rarely get the closure we want in relationships.
You broke up with a cheater who clearly is not interested in you and your feelings or just you and now you want to know why said cheater isn’t interested in your feelings. You need some self worth. Block the loser.
If he doesn’t respect you enough to remain faithful, it makes no sense to wonder why he doesn’t respect you enough to reply. Block him and move on, you are 1 million times better off without him.
If you clearly broke up with him, then why do you need a reply?
What do you want him to say. Be glad he’s gone and you don’t have to do more to get him to go away.
A cheater isn’t going to give you respect and closure.
What are you expecting? You broke up with him
this is going to sound mean but ima gonna say it anyway
he wasn’t that into you which is why he cheated.
he doesn’t respect you thats clear but he probably knows you better then you think. he probably knows this will hurt you and drive you mad so he think yeah, let her stew.
do not contact him. if you have each other’s stuff get a family member ti exchange reason i say family is because he won’t try to bs and justify his actions to family!
Him not getting back to you is your answer. He has checked out of the relationship but is hoping to do it with no further conversations or analysis; he just wants to drift off and move on. Let go of your need for some sort of closure and ask him to bag up your things so you can pick them up easily and quickly. You’ll be ok.
The only reason to ever break up with someone over text is so you don’t have to hear from the other side again.
He was cheating on you and asked you for space when you confronted him. That, to me, was more or less him breaking things off. The dude is too cowardly/doesn’t care enough to talk anymore with you. He’s trash, and even though it sucks, be glad you found out only 7 months in. You did nothing wrong – he’s just a slimy little scum bag, and you shouldn’t feel bad about texting him and telling him you need to come pick up your stuff from his place. If it’s stuff that you can live without, don’t even bother with it. Just block and move on.
Doesn’t matter. Move on
He was too much of a lowlife to be faithful, so him being appropriate or respectful at the end is probably asking way too much of his type.
If you have things of his, ask him to let you come by for a few minutes, gather your things, drop his things off, and farewell. No talking things out, just logistics of the items and leaving. That’s all there is left to do, and whether he can be counted on to handle that much is iffy.
Get tested, and I’m sorry he was a lying coward your entire time, through to the end.
He doesn’t care about you. He proved that by cheating on you. You should thank your lucky stars he isn’t begging you to take him back, because if he did that, you just might waste more of your life with him. Move on, be happy, and find someone who treats you with love and respect.
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EDIT: also just tell him you need to get your shit back. its your shit. don’t worry about being embarrassed because he didn’t respond. you’re all business.
So you broke things off with him and now waiting to hear if he’s going to stop it or fight for your connection?
“Oh baby, please no, wait, I’ll change, I’m not going to do this anymore.”
Like that? He was on there because he was already unsatisfied with the relationship, that it lacks certain things he’s looking for.
Maybe he doesn’t even care?
Just focus on yourself and heal your wounds from this relationship, as well as things about yourself that have kept you small and dimming your light.
Look at it this way.
If you have everything a person could possibly want in a person, why would they look anywhere else? They only do that because perhaps it’s lacking in some way.
Grow as a person and become your best version so that you can be the best in so many areas that when you do get with someone, they see in you everything they could ever hope for