(Use this as a partner account)
I’m pretty sure I have erection problems.
I still get hard and feel like having sex. But it’s not enough for sex. I am hard until i am inside her and its going soft. And this has been going on for 3 years… now I even have problems masturbating.
I’m actually quite athletic, eat well, don’t watch much porn. And I don’t think I’m nervous after so many times.
The only thing is that in my last serious relationship I didn’t have sex for 10 years. So I don’t know how long the problem has really been going on.
I would go to the doctor, but I live in the middle of nowhere and a urologist is super far away. Does anyone know or have experience if you can go to a GP and they can help. And how many appointments are needed for the diagnosis?
Thank you very much
3 comments
My GP is quite knowledgable about sex-related issues and I have not needed to see a urologist. Expect a few sessions due to getting blood work done and things like that and possibly needing to try different things to see how they work.
Are you feeling enough friction when you’re inside her? Some guys use a lot of friction when they jerk, and they don’t get the same stimulation during PIV. Most people on this sub would recommend that you stop jerking to increase sensitivity. If you do jerk, use lube and a light grip to mimic the feeling of a vagina.
If she is really wet, you could try wiping her to dry her off to increase the friction.
It could be psychological. If you thinking, worrying or not able to focus on her while you’re penetrating her, then it’s a psychological problem. You have to be relaxed, focused, and in the moment. Guys that have ADD or ADHD sometimes just can’t stay focused.
Start with requesting a ED med from a general practitioner. This year, I went to a urologist and he had little else to offer.
And in today’s New York Times, I read about a brand new medication called “Eroxon”. It was developed in England. In the USA, the government pharmaceutical authority, the FDA, has just approved it for use *without a prescription*, but it’s not available yet. In Britain and the EU, it is on the market, but requires a prescription.
I started having this problem in my 30s, out of the blue. If you follow this sub, even some men in their 20s get chronic ED. The problem of chronically getting hard, but losing it when you move your body, or just hold still and masturbate faster, is very common. I take tadalafil 10 mg daily and without it, I can’t stay rigid. I’ve never had any of the risk factors for chronic ED: I’ve never smoked, always been thin, blood pressure is low, I’m not even close to being diabetic.
Ultimately, the two major elements of the cause of ED seem to be failing valves in veins, and deficiency in a chemical that helps maintain erections. Tadalafil (Cialis) and other ED meds work by maintaining the levels of that chemical. Apparently, failing valves are usually not treatable.
But weak abdominal and pelvic muscles can contribute to the problem. I suspect that another factor could be using pelvic muscles incorrectly during masturbation and sex. Like, if you clench a lot near your crotch or alongside the tailbone. To control the pelvic movement, a person should be using muscles at the top and the outside (around the hip bones) of the pelvis, not muscles at the bottom and the middle of it.
In a minority of cases, there can be some particular cause that has a treatment specific to that cause. There are two basic types of ED: “failure to fill” (get rigid) and “failure to store” (stay rigid).
Tadalafil is better than sildenafil (Viagra) because it seems to have no side effects and its effect lasts for one to two days. The lowest dose is 5 mg.