Men of reddit, how did you get over someone you wanted to spend the rest of your life with?

32 comments

  2. When she turned me down I realised it wasn’t meant to be, and we never would have worked together anyway

  5. Time.

    Wanted to spend my life with her, she didn’t feel the same in the end. I’ll always think of her every now and then, but the feelings will fade eventually. In the meanwhile just focus on yourself. Go to the gym, get hobbies and get good at them, strengthen your ideas and morals. Make sure that you want to spend the rest of your life with you first.

  6. I learned that dogs are loyal, so now I just want a lifetime supply of puppies. 🐶

  7. It was like when I gave up smoking, it took a lot of time and willpower not to go back, even for a quick message or something. I was dreaming of her in that time as well, imagining we were back together. (I dreamed of smoking too and the excuses I’d give for starting again). After about 6 months it was back to normal, however I still have the odd dream, but I’m in a much better place.

    We’ve been apart over ten years now.

  8. Well, I couldn’t find someone else to spend the rest of my life with, so now I just cry myself to sleep.

  9. Well, I became a stand-up comedian and realized the only person I want to spend the rest of my life with is myself!

  12. Well, first I tried to jump over them, but that just resulted in a very awkward landing. So I went with hotdogs instead.

  13. I married her and im soooooo happy! (Apparently, so is she too, which helps 😆)

    But to answer the question properly:
    I never got that “i want to spend the rest of my life with you” feeling with any of my (now) exes. In fact that thought never occurred at the time (not that the relationships were bad).

  15. Well, first I tried jumping off a building, but then I realized I don’t have wings. So I settled for ice cream. Lots and lots of ice cream.

  16. Well, I tried to fixate on them and developed a drinking habit, not working on myself to be a better partner and better person. When they reached out, I was unstable and blew up and ruined it, granted they were fucking mean with one thing they told me…
    This turned into a worse habit and full mental breakdown. I then decided I needed to do intense therapy and I’ve learned to let go, also meeting one other person and linking up once kinda helped me see how much better life will be if I stop thinking about them all the time.

    I still think of the version of them in my head, but I know that’s a false idol, so I’m enjoying life to the fullest 😁

  17. Reading some of these responses makes me realize most guys want to spend the rest of their lives with people they just met lol most responses are way too simple to actually have meant wanting to spend the rest of their lives together.

  18. I had to cut all connections to that person. Removed from contacts, blocked on social media and most importantly I had to make that decision in my head, 100%, not feeding any hope. Not because I hated her, but because I knew she did not feel it the same way.

  20. Honestly you don’t but what helped me is changing your mindset from what could’ve happened into being grateful for what you experienced with that person and learned from that relationship despite it ending.

  21. By realizing that love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably shit.

  23. You either get over it or it eats you up. Worry and pain should not dictate the outcome of your life. They happen. Move forward

  24. It’s a grieving process but your grieving the relationship that you once had and the same as grief eases with time so will this.
    You don’t have to forget you just gradually remember it less

  25. Well, first I found a time machine. Then I went back and unhinged my heart from their evil clutches. Easy peasy!

  26. Took me almost a year. I deleted her number and photos. We met a few weeks ago again. I told her I removed her number so I would never send her a drunk text again. No idea why but she send me a message again just to give her numer to me again. I dont care about her anymore. Shes still on my mind tho. But I met someone else at a club one weekend and we started chatting and hit it off quite well. When we left the club I ran like a little child to her and asked if I could maybe get her number. She gave it and I gave her a hug. Nex morning we started chatting and it went so well we’re still chatting. This one Im gonna take slow and careful. Give it time man.

  27. It’s hard to move on, especially when you love the woman very much and dream of her being the one to be with when you grow old, as time goes by you will be able to move on with her.

  28. Easy. Never give away so much of yourself that you couldn’t live without the other person.

    Allow yourself a single degree of separation.

  29. Accepting the fact that she isn’t the person that I thought she is and she would be a bad mother and a bad wife so our future would be awful. Currently stopping all kinds of contact with her

  30. By accepting that they don’t want to spend the rest of their life with you. When you accept that, you realize that continuing to want them is silly and not loving to them nor to yourself. To me that is the first step towards learning to live without them.

  32. It gets easier over time, and each experience helps you be better informed for the next one

    My first heartbreak was probably when I was around 15, and that took me maybe a year and some change to fully get over

    Now I’m in my early 30’s, and while the initial sting never truly goes away, you have more emotional intelligence to realize it’s ultimately for the best, and moving on was pretty quick. I think a day tops before I end up meeting someone else and ended up going on a date the week after

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