I will make this short and won’t go into details as I think it’s unnecessary but I will try to answer any questions.
We have been dating for 6 years and I really love him. Since about 3 months ago I notices he has been more distant, less affectionate. He hasn’t said he loves me in a year, maybe more. I do say it occasionally, he doesn’t say it back, just hugs me or pats me on the head. Recently he just seems like he doesn’t care about me, about what I do. I started tattoo apprenticeship a month ago and he doesn’t care, when I show him my work he just responds with “nice” or something like that. He never tells me about what he’s been up to, when I ask he says just stuff you know. I don’t.
A few days ago I realized he probably just doesn’t love me anymore, it really feels like it. I tried talking to him, he denied not loving me, but never said he does. This hurts more than if he just said he doesn’t.
How should I approach it? I’m scared of asking a yes or no question, I know it’s stupid and immature but I’ve been very emotional for the past few days and not really able to think straight, I just have millions of thoughts and emotions running through my head all the time
2 comments
Don’t approach, depart. All the signs were obvious for 3 months. It took you too long to only realize this a few days ago. He’s avoiding this conflict by lying so there’s nothing left to ask or say, unless you just want more denial. Your relationship as you knew it has been over.
You’ve been with the guy for 6 years. That’s a really long time and you should know him pretty well I would hope. If his behavior has changed recently, particularly in how he relates to you, then that indicates that something is wrong.
It could be any number of things influencing his behavior. You are young and got together when you were very young and likely immature. People grow and change a lot in young adulthood and it’s possible that the two of you have grown apart.
Given the 6 years you have been together, I would sit down with him and talk about what’s going on calmly. Tell him all the things you mentioned here about his behavior and make him tell you honestly what is going on.
It may not be that he no longer loves you, it could be any number of things. When you talk to him remain calm and don’t get defensive about anything or he won’t open up to you.