I (F24) have been hanging out with my ex’s (M39) best friend (M40)

I (F24) broke up with my ex (M39) about a year ago. We used to always be at his best friends (M40) house hanging out.
I haven’t seen the best friend in almost a year, but
Saturday night I went and hung out with him and watch a few people pop off fireworks down the street.
Sunday morning I went back to have breakfast with him.

Totally chill hang outs. Just like old times.

Then
Monday night we go riding bikes with a few of his friends. I’ve only rode with him on the back of a Kawasaki Ninja but we’re going on a Harley this time.
Alright, no need to be all crouched over him trying to hold on for dear life on a Harley.
So I’m sat all proper with a straight back in the bitch seat, one hand on his shoulder and the other on his side. We start riding and all of a sudden I’m a back rest… His back is resting against my chest.
Alright whatever… Sorta odd but not gonna mention it, right?
But then later his hand needs a rest. Usually he puts it on his leg, maybe his elbow touching my knee but that’s about it.
This time, he just rests it on my knee. Okay then ..
We are riding back to the spot we have our cars and he just rests against my chest and puts his whole arm around my leg. Forearm on my thigh, hand above my boot.
I go home and silently freak out, because was he just being comfy or was he hugging my leg for another reason (and bikers who wanna help a lady out?)
Fast forward to the night of 4th of July. I wanna watch the fireworks. His place is in a good place to watch all the small towns around put on their shows. So I’m chilling outside with him until the lights end.
We go inside and watch something stupid and start playing poker.
Around 12:30 I almost fall asleep on the couch, so I get up to go potty. (Because that’s a good way to wake up 🤣)
I come back and he’s laid down in his bed, and in all those years I never stepped foot into his room. So I’m standing at the door way, about to say good bye, and he tells me I can come in.
I’m a nosey creature..
I go in.
He’s playing poker on his phone.
I sit down next to him to watch because he’s betting big money.
Well, I wake up at 5 am to his alarm going off.
His ac is on, and his fan is on full blast. It’s cold.
I’m half asleep, and still not 100% sober.
So he’s trying to get out of bed and I snatch his body and throw his ass back on the mattress. Like nope, it’s 5am, I’m cold and you’re taking away your body heat? Gimme it back.
So, I’m snuggled up on him wrapped up like a pretzel and he keeps saying he has to get up. I just snuggle harder squeeze my eyes shut and shove my head into his chest, and whine.
Next thing I know I’ve been flipped over like a Sunday morning pancake and this man is above me smirking nonchalantly saying thanks and sliding off the bed.
Like, what just happened?
So, I accepted defeat and just make myself a cocoon with his blanket.
He comes back in later to tell me he’s leaving for work. I’m already done half asleep again. And I don’t remember exactly what happened. But he took his vitamins, sat next to me on his bed, was talking to me, and I guess I closed my eyes again but he kissed me. And instead of being just stunned stupid, when he pulls away I wrap my arm around his neck and pull him back down to kiss me again.
I’ve been at home for a couple hours, and he tells me my ex just showed up to his house.
Bet, no problem. He always shows up about 2 times a week.
Then he sends me a text and tells me that they “talked” and the best friend now has my ex’s ‘blessing’
I should be totally grateful right?

No! Because despite my actions this morning, I don’t want a relationship with this man! I ignored signs of affection from him because I assumed I was off limits due to some sort of bro code. And then fucked everything up worse by my weakness for morning kisses.

Now, how do you break your ex’s best friend’s heart? After your- hung over & half asleep -self kissed him!