I’m worried I might be sending some misleading signals or something because I don’t know why this keeps on happening. I’m generally quite an awkward person and I don’t flirt. I turn beetroot red when I realise, I’m the only one talking at a party (that kind of awkward). I know I’ve ended up with more guy friends due to my interests (there are girls that share these interests just not as many). I don’t want to lose friends this way. I also feel like I’m trapped and unable to start new friends with women because of my work and hobbies. My best friend is a girl but she lives in the city that takes two hours to get to. Any advice would be greatly appreciated🙌🏻 🎷🦙. Like what to avoid? or maybe some things that would keep a girl in the friend category?

Just to clarify I mainly work with women going through menopause and who have kids/grandchildren so work is literally one of the only things we can talk about. Lovely women, but not women I’d really invite to play games with or go to a concert. At parties I generally stay very close to my best friend (mentioned earlier) because I can just ramble about things to her easily, which usually sparks a group conversation anyway. Obviously I talk to everyone but if she’s there I’d say I spend 60/75% of my time talking to her.

TLDR: the question at the top should really be what would make you friendzone a girl? But also, I’m looking for things that could be avoided if they seem like good traits. I’m not so certain.

32 comments

  1. So I met a girl off a dating site. I thought I wanted to date her for a while but I wasn’t feeling it. She told me she wanted things to be serious but I told her that I’d rather be friends if we could. That was 3 years ago and she is one of my best friends. We talk at least 2 times a week.

    I met another woman online, but on a video game. It was clear she had a crush on me but I shut that down as soon as I could before she started imaging life together. That person is also a long time friend of mine. I wasn’t attracted to her, she lived far away and I was in a bad place at the time I met her.

  4. I can’t think of a reason why I’d want to friendzone a woman. I don’t really see the point in keeping ladies in the friend role. No real benefit for me at this point in my life. I have acquaintances, but not friends.

  5. 1. if she wants kids
    2. if I don’t find her sexualy attractive
    3. if she doesn’t find me sexualy attractive

  6. Usually depending on certain factors (like age, what they like, how they act)

    Last girl I friend zoned was thanks to her ambushing with her confusing me with her preference…then months later…her telling me she likes some dude at her job.

  7. Men don’t friendzone women. Men may have women who are just friends.

    The male equiv of the friend zone is when a woman he is sleeping with is on rotation.

    Friendzone = receiving the benefits of a relationship without making the investment.

  8. I’m confused. You WANT to be friendzoned? I think you might be using this term wrong. Normally that’s a bad thing.

    But to just answer your question, ignoring the confusing context, I “friendzone” a girl when she’s not attractive but otherwise I like hanging out with her.

  9. I friendzone girls A) who I’m not attracted to and B) who never express any kind of romantic interest in me. I wouldn’t want to date people in Camp A, and I generally assume the people in Camp B aren’t interested in me so I move on from them.

  10. Well, obviously the lack of interest or attraction to her. Incompatability too.

  11. “I don’t flirt”

    If a girl isn’t trying to flirt with me, or doesn’t seem interested if I’m trying to flirt with her, I just assume she isn’t interested and treat her like a friend going forward.

    The other reason I would friendzone someone is if they’re dating or have dated friends of mine. When I read your title, a girl immediately popped in my head. I’ve always thought she was attractive, but growing up she dated my best friend, and then a couple other friends after him over the years. We were always close, but I never thought of her as an option because of that. I didn’t even realize I friendzoned her until recently when she liked me on Hinge. I was surprised because I thought she always felt the same way about me. Even though I still think she’s attractive, and she hasn’t dated any friends lately, I’m just not interested. She was in the zone for too long. It’s like a mental block now.

  12. Im not reading all that shit. Friendzoning should never happen. Make your intentions known as soon as possible, communicate where you would like to go (as far as the relatiomship) and get an answer. If its not reciprocated or its not working out, make a definitive ending and move on. I never keep friendships with women if it doesnt work out.

  13. When I only like her as a friend

    And don’t listen to people who say men don’t friendzone women

    I have because I’m not into that certain woman like that.

  14. A short list of reasons to friendzone a woman

    -misleading profile pictures

    -not exciting to talk to (lack of flirting, poor communication,etc.)

    -toxic attitude

    -mismatch in values and lifestyle choices

    -hygiene (low key the biggest one for me, met a few women with great personalities but terrible at housekeeping. Remember, somewhere down the road the thought of moving in together will come up! I value a clean home and this WILL break a relationship no matter how much you like her.)

  15. If she is involved with another guy.
    If she is a lesbian.
    If she isn’t attracted to me.
    If I am not attracted to her.

  16. I don’t friendzone anyone. I act accordingly to her actions, unless I’m actually interested in going further.

  19. There is absolutely no reason why you should feel bad for offerring friendship to another person. If they want more from you than you are willing to give, and you’re clear about that in a kind way, any conflict is THEIR fault.

  21. If you don’t make physical moves towards someone, they will friendzone you. You either put it out there you are DTF or you don’t. Friends generally don’t get down. If you are putting off that vibe, then friend zone you go.

  23. I’m ugly as hell, I’m in my 40’s, low to no value and not going to embarrass myself by being stupid enough to think that a woman who I think is attractive sees me as anything other than an ugly creep.

  24. >and I don’t flirt.

    Again, we’re not fucking mind readers. Stop expecting us to do ALL of the work. This is what causes us to friendzone you.

  26. She’s fat, ugly, or has kids.

    I just read the title and responded.

  28. *”What makes you friendzone a woman?”*

    The same reason that a woman would friendzone a man.

  30. Why I would friendzone:

    – Party girls (I am not anti-social, but we are definitely not compatible)
    – Doesn’t take care of herself
    – Being dumb as bricks
    – Having zero hobbies, interests or opinions (far more common that one might think)
    – Sending mixed signals constantly (I don’t have the time to keep up with bullshit like this)

  31. Well I like to fuckem for a few weeks and them put them on the self for later!

  32. If I’m or she’s taken. Otherwise, if there’s attraction, I never fully close the door

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