I’ve(26M) been going out with this girl (22f) for a little over a month now. Things have been going smooth and progressing. We’ve went on more than 10 dates in this time. Haven’t made anything official but probably moving in that direction. Last night we were talking and she feels like I’m not meeting her love language which is gift giving. I’m not the greatest at gift giving. A week or so ago we were talking and she mentioned how she loved when her grandma got her the jellybeans from Costco and later that week I was at Costco and she was like you didn’t even get me jellybeans! (Which does sound like a good idea but now I feel like I can’t do that)
I guess my question is what are some good gift ideas for an early relationship? I know it’s the idea and the fact that you were thinking about them is what counts.
She has given me a couple gift and while they’re cute it’s not my particular love language, I feel like we both are giving the love language that we’d like to receive
4 comments
My two cents is to not go overboard with presents. Simple, one nice gift can show you care without putting too much pressure on the new relationship. That’s what worked best for me!
Keep it small, simple, and personal.
Pay attention to her interests, and give small things she enjoys
A small bag of jelly beans when you’re out.
A little jelly bean trinket (it’s the only info you gave me lol)
It isn’t about the cost or size of the gift… it’d about how you listened and reacted to her and did it without her saying you need to.
“I love dogs” get a little dog stuffed animal
“I wonder how that tastes” get her it!
The problem here is that the sexual roles are all messed up. She views herself as the dominant person, in other words the person to be patronized and you are the “client”, therefore she expects you to show up with gifts, the way a good client does. Obviously this is not a good basis for a relationship between a man and a woman. The man is supposed to be the patron and the woman is supposed to be the client, not the other way around.
You can expect more problems going forwards if you continue in the current way.
>she feels like I’m not meeting her love language which is gift giving
lmao……