There’s this guy he’s a president of an organization, let’s name him Brandon and I’m an officer. He made a move on me when we had a party and I asked him to recommend me to a guy to date; he told me why can’t I date him instead. After that he apologized and said it was the alcohol.
Then after that he was clingy, he slipped and said “Once we have children– once I have children I’ll give it a long name.” I just ignored it. I’m ignoring his moves and attempt at flirtation because we’re in a professional environment.
This week I met someone who’s interested at me romantically who is also his friend. During that time he was making move, Brandon kept interfering and saying how that’s why I’m his type and why he fell in love with me. I ignored both of them and went with my friends the rest of the event.
Now, he’s being physical and blatant, slipping on how much he loves me and why he loves me when I do something minimal. I used to ignore it, but I don’t know now since his attempts increases. What should I do now? How can I make sure if he’s not toying with me just to make me uncomfortable? How can I be sure if he’s genuine? How can I shut him down?
9 comments
Ew. You ignored him and he didn’t take the hint.
Set him straight ‘your advances are unwanted and bothersome, stop’
or
you go to HR.
Its important to communicate your boundaries clearly and directly – let him know that his advances are unwelcome and you expect them to stop.
I would tell Brandon that you don’t date anyone who you associate with in business or a professional organization. He is way off on flirting with you, naming children and saying he loves you. It comes across as creepy.
I would also not ask him for a recommendation for anyone you are thinking of dating.
This is called sexual harassment and needs to be reported
Rule #1: Be attractive
Is there a way you can report him? He’s your boss which makes flat out telling him you’re not interested harder, because you’re afraid you’ll lose your job in retaliation.
Before reporting this poor guy to the FBI, maybe you could just tell him clearly that you are not interested in him ? Not ignoring him. ” i’m not interested romanticaly in you and your attempt are making me inconfortable.” Is it that hard ? You are not a kid anymore. This dude is trying since you are not clear with him.
And if he insist report him go the HR.
Who cares if he is genuine or doing this on purpose to bother you? He is inappropriate and it’s sexual harassment.
Email him using your official email from this organization and tell him that he is inappropriate. Provide quotes of what he has said. Said that it’s unprofessional and you are not interested. Tell him he has to stop. Point out he is the president of this organization and that he has to act accordingly and follow whatever rules/policies it has and quote some or send him to the rules (there was to be some type of conduct/policies/etc).
It’s confusing is this is like work or like a non-profit. If it’s a non-profit or club, then you can go to other people to remove him.
Is this organisation a job or a after work club kind of thing, it’s unclear. Is he the only president or a Vp type, or more. Basically if you report this guy is it likely you’ll get fired if this is the way you make your living. If yes, apply for new jobs, get a new job, when leaving file a complaint about him and leave them to deal with it.
If there’s many levels above him and he’s not one of the only few bosses if not the only boss, then make a complaint now and tell him to leave you alone.