We were talking every day for a month and hung out every weekend between our work/school. Last Saturday we went to an aquarium and had a great time, went to a festival after for food and then walked the dogs she is petsitting down to the park.
She mentioned she was having some problems charging her phone and texted giving me warning in case she dropped out of contact. I’m guessing that happened because I haven’t heard anything from her Sunday onwards. I stupidly didn’t suggest we share any other means of communication and thus was thinking of going over to hers at the end of the week to say hello, maybe bring some flowers. I know she is going to be out of town this weekend, so I was planning on going over Friday after my shift.
Want to get some input from others before I go through with this though, is this fine or am I being creepy and crossing a line? The only reason I’m considering it is because she gave me a heads up about the phone and she was reacting to my messages with hearts, and saying she was enjoying spending time with me. Any case I’ve been enjoying spending time with her as well and want to keep seeing her. I could just wait for her phone to get fixed, but it feels too passive, idk.
Reddit. Either give me a bit of affirmation that this is fine so I can go get em, or give me a reality check and tell me how creepy I am being please lol.
17 comments
She literally told her phone is dying and you shouldnt get this wrong. So in this specific case of course its fine ! If she would mean she didnt wanted contact she wouldnt told you that stuff especialy that she dont want to end the contact. Perhabs its realy just a broken phone and she have to wait till a new one arrives. Sounds plausible.
People mean stuff like the pizza delivery guy standing in front of your bedroom at night……did happen to a friend i was confused why she was scared to order pizza and i should play her BF but yeah there are weirdos out there….
I’d go over with flowers. The worst that happens is you find out she’s seeing someone else. It’s only been a month, you actually don’t have much to lose and a lot to gain.
She’ll know you’re definitely interested!
Good luck,!
This sounds like a bad idea
Have you been to her place before? I think it would be a bad idea if you show up unannounced if you haven’t been there before
Wait did you say that you haven’t spoken to her since Sunday and you want to go over to her place on Friday?
How does that make any sense bruv? She’s not charging her phone for the whole work week???
As a female, if I really liked you and I knew this was going to happen with my phone I’d have written down your number and used a friend or family members phone to contact you (even just the once to check in). She may be using this as an excuse to ghost/hang out with someone else. Can you find her on social media to drop her a message?
I think I’d be weirded out if a guy I’d only been seeing for a month turned up at my house, if she really wanted to contact you she’d have made sure to find a way surely?
I don’t get everyone telling you no. As a girl who’s had something similar happen (my phone broke because I dropped it though 🥲) I wouldn’t be creeped out by this. If the circumstances were different and things were going poorly or even just not great I would suggest otherwise. But tbh it sounds like she’d probably be glad you made the effort. Plus showing up with flowers and a phone for her to use isn’t necessarily an expectation to come in and hang out as much as it is a “hey I miss you and I want us to be able to contact eachother if you want to”.
Don’t do the drop in. It’s not ok to suddenly show up uninvited
don’t ever show up to someone’s house without their permission if you are not 100% confident they would be okay with that
typically gathered by: expressed consent
Showing up to someone’s place uninvited, especially when I’ve known the person for just one month, seems a bit weird to me. Just my opinion nonetheless; sounds like many others seem ok with it in the comments 🙂
Absolutely TF not.
do NOT show up at her place unannounced!!!
As a woman, anyone showing up at my place unannounced is a nightmare for me. My home is my safe space, I do not want to be popped up on here.
Especially a man I am casually dating. Without express consent, this is totally inappropriate!!!
If y’all were in a serious long term relationship and were both ok with ‘popping in’ that would be different.
You’re not even close enough to her to have her instagram? Do not show up at her house.
Waiting to see (if her phone is broken/if she’s ghosting you) is not passive. It’s normal. Surprising her at her house, especially when you haven’t heard from her in almost a week, is WAY too aggressive
Spoiler alert. She’s making these excuses up front to avoid you and so she can see another guy. Either be okay that she’s playing the field until she makes a decision or leave her. If I were you, I’d go on as many dates with other people as possible. She’ll either figure out your worth or someone else will properly value you. Either way, don’t get stuck on her. If she really wanted to be exclusive with you, she would find a way around her excuses.
Yea no don’t do that if you don’t hear from her by Friday just wait. If she really wanted to talk to you she would of gotten in touch. Showing up unannounced seems like a red flag. So is her dropping out of contact tho.
Your better off just sending flowers with your number telling her to call you. She might not have her phone but she’d be able to at least use someone’s to say hello and maybe make plans. If she doesn’t contact you after that you know where you stand.
Yeah, please don’t do that
For me, it really depends on how she mentioned it to you before it happened. But if she was sending sweet stuff after, I say just go for it. You’re self aware enough to know it could backfire, but I like that you’re not trying to be passive with her. A lot of dudes give waaaaayyyy too much space when dating, then the ladies are like, does he like me? Is a very confusing time to date, so go get em tiger, just don’t cry later if you realize she was being awful at ghosting.
Of you’re too insistent to go, leave the stuff at her doorstep. Let her have her space to react however she wants comfortably. If you put a phone as well, she’ll contact you through it (be ready to never see that phone again as well lol).