Bestest friend ever rejected me. I moved on. I used to text her for HOURS daily (she would too, cause we were best friends).
After rejection, I either text her like max 4 messages a day (within the convo). Or I message her once every 2 days. I keep the vibe good, I’m not overly dry. Let’s say I message her 4 texts, 1 or 2 will be dry, the rest will have almost the same good energy (70%).
Now she calls me Mr. Boyfriend and wants to constantly know what I’m up to.
I never complimented her looks before – I showed pure best friend energy
Now that she is showing interest, should I keep this aloof energy and will this make her like me?
I won’t lie, I’m still secretly in love with her
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13 comments
Sounds like you both need to mature a little, especially her. Lol
It sounds like she’s playing with your feelings. I would want space if I got rejected by someone I’m super close to. But if she likes you back, she needs to say it clearly bc calling you “Mr. boyfriend” when you’re her best friend is sus.
Ask her what what is her intention.
Did she change her mind or is she just giving you this type of attention because she misses guetting attention from you and talking with you for multiple hours?
You’re doing it right dude. Keep the aloofness, work out a little more so you get cut up and then in one of those four daily texts mention another girl one you find hot. Just work it into the convo you say she’s interested in why your doing tell her your going to hang out with Julie and her friends or something. But don’t lie
She loves the attention but don’t want the real commitment. I would confront her and ask her what game is she playing by calling you « Mr Boyfriend »? I don’t think she’s showing real interest, she just don’t want to lose the attention you are giving her.
But maybe it’s real and maybe she’s in love with you and maybe she just doesn’t know how to communicate it effectively. That’s why you have to step up and ask her directly what does she want ?
Whatever her answer is, believe her. Then, you can decide in full consciousness what to do.
Super sus. It happens plenty, though. If you show too much interest, you get rejected. Be aloof, and she starts following because she is wondering where the attention went.
Let’s also get something clear, you aren’t in love with her, you are infatuated with her. Big difference and that difference makes it a huge different way of looking at it.
My advice is to actually confront her about it. Be direct and clear. If she rejects you again, move on. If she doesn’t…. well, proceed at your own risk. I say that because there is a chance that she will say “yess I want you” and then when you get with her she might go “omg this is no fun I don’t have to work for his attention anymore” and then drop you.
The bottom line playing the aloof game is childish and stupid, dont do that. You both need to define how the relationship works though.
It sounds like she’s toying with a little bit. Bread-crumbing like hansel and gretel. She rejected you and yet she wants to talk to you in a highly suggestive and flirty manner. I suspect she knows how you feel deep down. Yet she’s not prepared to take that next step to a relationship. I would encourage you to keep her at a distance. It seems she is taking you for granted.
Do you want to date her or not? You and her need to hash it out. Don’t tip toe around it. Let her know that you were hurt when she rejected you. Tell her that you don’t want to play games. You both need to agree on the direction your relationship is heading.
Also I would very highly recommend reading the following book:
The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene
Great book. Quite short. Easy to read everyday language. Very relatable.
It sounds like she’s testing the waters. If you straight up asked what was up, it might ruin your chance. I don’t think she rejected you because she was entirely against being with you. It doesn’t even sound like she doesn’t have feelings, just might not be aware of them. Don’t stay aloof either, putting up the wall over the long term doesn’t help your chances with anyone. I don’t have straight up advice for you. But flirt back a little bit. Meet her where she’s at, and don’t escalate. Constantly reassess how you’re feeling. Some people like to fall in love slowly, and I know nothing about her.
My biggest piece of advice which would of been the case reading most of your post would have been to pay her no mind and spend your energy on someone whose in the place you are and willing to meet you where you’re at. But you’re in love with her. I’ve been there. So you might as well have a plan.
Hope it works out best for the both of you.
Sounds like now you’re even deeper in the friend zone.
Because she’s trying to push you out of the picture and take your position in the relationship and he’s allowing it
Keep the aloof energy, don’t go any further without CLEAR signs or even a conversation.