You may have found yourself many times at dinner parties or social gatherings, where you didn’t have much interest in the people there. In fact, you didn’t even like to be there, or like anyone there. But have you ever tried to consciously say to yourself “What the heck, I’m here anyways. I might as well make the best of my time”?
I you do this and engage in conversation with people with full attention and involvement, you may see that what you had first expected of the night/event may become something totally different. It’s incredible how interesting conversations and how much fun you can have with people you did’t even like to begin with. It’s just a matter of fixing your attitude a little bit. After all, we are all just people here on this planet with our own faults, struggles and annoying habits.
This quote says it all. Sadhguru: “When you consciously rise above your likes and dislikes, that is maturity.” And with maturity should also comes compassion, understanding and more good times.
11 comments
I think this depends on the people and situation. It some of my best friends as a kid were people I really disliked or found annoying at first. But as an adult I already know what kind of people I do well with, and lately, trying to force myself to be friends with people I’m not compatible with and don’t really like even after trying for a long while, has resulted in a lot of hurt for me. Sometimes you have yo know how to choose the people you spend your time with, you don’t want to end up with people who are toxic, rude or judgemental
Hanging out with people you don’t like might be better than not hanging out at all but you should still try to find the people you like
Outside of work, I actively avoid ppl I don’t like ¯_(ツ)_/¯
This is very good advice.
Once you know there’s no escaping the gathering/social event you have the choice to sulk or embrace the moment and at least try make the most of it.
>If you learn to be with people you don’t like,
This platform is full of people acknowledging introvert as some sort of autism, so you gonna have hard time explaining the necessity of this.
This is true, and I agree with you. Learn to embrace uncomfortable situations, learn the process and you’ll grow. It will help you to step out of your comfort zone and will give you an additional perspective in every aspect of life. 😊
I think sometimes its our mind that becomes judgemental of the people around us. As soon as we enter that space it reminds us of our judgements and at that point, we have a choice – do we want to go with our judgement or give that person a chance and explore other aspects of him/her that we may not be actually aware of. So yes it can be interesting to have that shift in perspective and it can actually turn out to be fun as you said.
I have personally tried this so many times and it never worked for me. I always end up feeling miserable in the end
What if the people don’t like you aswell and want to bully you because of how you are?
Well pick your battles because the time we have is limited
Ya know, I tried this with my sister in laws parents, who are without any hesitation, horrible. The last few extended family gatherings, I decided “I’m just going to engage and hear them out and be open minded.” Went in with a full on positive attitude. I even tried to hear their points of view on various subject. Oh you think Q-anon conspiracies are true? Please tell me all about that!
Eventually, after drawing them out and being very generous of spirit, they became very judgmental towards me. They didn’t offer me the same spirit of kindness and openness that I was extending towards them. Turns out that it isn’t just their politics that suck. They genuinely suck. They’re judgmental, rude, anti social, mean. And I think I’ll avoid them from now on.