I’m constantly having stupid fallouts with my girlfriend over money. Context, she’s done really well for herself especially for her age, avoided college but climbed the ladder in her industry really quickly. I’m in a completely different industry job-wise and salary-wise, but still earn a good salary, but she’s on double what I earn.
We live together in an apartment where the bills and rent are split proportionate to what we earn, so we both have our own expendable income after everything comes out. Obviously still, mine is a lot less than hers. The problems start arising with spending, going on dates, shopping. My girlfriend enjoys spending on expensive things, going out a lot, getting meals out (as she should be able to), but expects me to be able to keep up with it. Which I can’t. So as the month end nears, I’m much more cautious and cut back on ‘fun’ stuff so I maintain a healthy account and don’t just blow it all.
It’s when this time hits especially, when I have money left because I’m cautious with it, that we argue. She sees it as “you have X money why can’t we just do this” or “you have X money left, you can pay for this shop as I pay more in rent”….. and the argues flow. I don’t see it as fair that just because I’ve been good with my money and have plenty left, that it warrants spending it but also being called out on bills and splits we already agreed (we split food shops 50/50).
It really brings the worst out in her and I’m beginning to dislike the person it brings out. We argue a lot over it, and I feel I get unfairly called out.
Is this an unfair living situation to be in, or am I being over-cautious with (MY) money?
TLDR; girlfriend and I argue over money a lot. Our spending habits are different and I get called out on our proportionate splits for being more careful with my spending