About a year ago, I (22M) finally decided to drop a really toxic group of people that wasn’t doing me any good, and I wish I had done this sooner.
However, they were insistent, and for a while, they wouldn’t leave me alone. They would try to get me to speak to them constantly and get answers from me. Eventually, out of concern that they wouldn’t quit, I did explain how I was feeling and why I decided to make the choice I did. I didn’t mention that I thought they were toxic because I didn’t want to cause any problems or create a more tense atmosphere, but I did give them an explanation that I thought was sufficient, and luckily, after that, the situation seemed to be resolved.
Recently, my parents have been pushing me to reconnect with those people, and this is something that I do not wish to do under any circumstances. I’ve been experiencing a lot of change in my life lately, and I’m trying to become the best person I can possibly be. This was one of the factors that really helped me realize that I needed to drop people from my life.
I don’t really talk to my parents about this kind of personal stuff because I don’t have the closest relationship with them. I get along fine with them, but I prefer to keep my personal life out of our conversations for the most part.
So, I don’t really know how to address this situation, and it worries me. I’m worried that my parents will take matters into their own hands and make things worse. (I am a young adult btw but I am not independent, so it’s not so easy to just brush this off.) I can’t tell them that I view them as toxic people, but they don’t seem to believe my alternative explanation, that we just drifted apart with time.
How do you suggest I handle this in a way that I can finally settle this once and for all and leave it behind?
TLDR: A year ago I cut off some toxic people from my life but now my parents are trying to get me to reconnect with them, which is something I don’t want, but I don’t know how to explain to them that those people were toxic and I am glad that I dropped them.
1 comment
Have your parents said why they think you should reconnect with that group? For example, if they want you to have an active and healthy social life, you can seek out social connections with other people whose values, attitudes, and behaviors are more aligned with yours.