Women says she wants to date exclusively, but not be in a relationship. When I ask her about it she’s annoyed. Somebody explain to me what she means, please?
I said to her, ‘I’m a bit confused. You say you’re not ready for a relationship, but you don’t want me dating anyone else.’, and now she’s annoyed. Said, she’s confused. That I don’t understand her. That Im not listening. That she never said that. That I ruined things, because a minute ago we were OK. That shes going to leave me alone. To go and enjoy Tinder. Now she’s telling me not to lead people on.
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She sounds like a tool. Sounds like she wants her cake and to eat it too. I’d toss the towel in because you deserve better then that treatment. If she wants you to be exclusive but not in a relationship that doesn’t make sense. Btw I’m a 35 year old woman. This is BS.
Honestly I’m confused too bro. I would just move on and mark it as you avoided a headache. Let the bad ones weed themselves out for you.
Run and count your blessings you didn’t end up in a relationship with her.
Did you ask her which personality you were speaking with during each of these exchanges?
She doesn’t want commitment.
She wants to shelf you until she finds someone “better”
I’d just leave and get some space. If she was serious about you she would make it very clear what her intentions with you are and in a way she has.
She wants y’all to fk with each other but not other people without the drama and responsibility of a relationship.
She sounds like she would be horrible to continue a relationship with. Someone you are with should try to understand you and not leave you confused with a big question mark. If you don’t understand each other now, it will only get worse.
This “exclusive” but not “official” bs drives me insane. Either it’s a relationship or not, she doesn’t get to have it both ways. I would drop her and let her know that if she’s gonna be mad, then she doesn’t get to have you at all.
She’s for sure playing in your face. Run and let her do that shit with someone else
From what I’m seeing – she’s reading too much into it. She thinks you’re implying that you want to date other people.
I know it’s a reach, but from her response that’s how she took it.
It’s just up to you whether clarifying is worth it and proceeding with the relationship.
She wants to only focus on dating you, but not officially make the bf/gf title yet. It’s not like it all means anything but to her it seems to.
It actually sounds pretty simple to me. Since there’s no relationship she’s free to see anyone she wants. But since you’d be agreeing to exclusivity, you wouldn’t have the ability to do that. Hope you walked away, because if you agree to this you’ll be meeting up with her and be introduced to some other guy as “this is my friend!”
Stay away from people like this. My main problem is not that her request is confusing—because it is—it’s more that she got annoyed when you asked her to clarify or explain her position.
I’ve dated women like that. Think about all the things you guys will disagree about in the relationship. Now picture her acting like this on ALL of them. It’s “my way or the highway” with these kinds of people, and it’s manipulative.
I’ve been exclusive, but not in a relationship before.
Assuming you are both exclusive, it just means like you aren’t dating anyone else, but like not necessarily introducing each other to your folks or friends as gf/bf, not necessarily posting cute pics on Instagram. Being still somewhat casual for dates. Not necessarily owing each other x amount of time each week. Not necessarily planning too far into the future or
planning a life together.
It’s like a small intermediate step before being “official”. Maybe that step is not pertinent as you get older, maybe it is. The “break ups” are less intense and maybe less mourning time.
For instance, I wouldn’t get a cat or move in with someone I was exclusive with, but i would with a girlfriend. However, I’d do a weekend get away or super really romantic things with someone I’m exclusive with. I’d maybe clear a major purchase with a girlfriend or have her have a say in naming my new puppy or consider sharing finances with her, but not with someone I’m only exclusive with. I’d feel okay about not spending the holidays together with someone I’m exclusive with, but coordinate holiday trips and visiting families with a gf and making SURE we were together.
There’s less “hard” conversations, planning, and compromise with someone who I’m exclusive with, but not in a relationship with.
That’s my definition anyway and that only applies if you’re BOTH exclusive. It’s usually not a long period if everything seem to be going right. It’s cause that label of a girlfriend means A LOT to me.
But by all means, if you don’t want that grey area “label”, but non-label of being exclusive, then ditch her cause it’s not compatible for what you want.
Good luck!
Do you want to date other people?
Sounds like she wants other D while u get none
First we would need to know how this whole topic got brought up.
I recently had an old flame come back and tell me he wanted to date me treat me properly, and so on… He found out I was out dating. He got jealous and wanted us to only see each other.. so I cancelled several dates for him. He wanted me to wait for him because he was sure he could capture my heart. A little while ago he told me he didn’t want a relationship. He just wanted me to wait to have sex with others. I don’t want to be in a relationship. I’m not ready for that. I was so confused and upset because I thought maybe he wanted more. I had to end the phone call.
I’m like why the hell did you have me wait for you. How could you have me canceling dates! He tried to talk me into still meeting with him. But I told him if I did I’d feel cheap and angry at myself for letting him pull stuff on me. At first I said we can meet but no funny business. Then I told him sorry I’m not interested in playing games bye take care of yourself. You my friend dodged a bullet. Be grateful.
But also be clear with your words… Good luck in this crazy world!
I had to end it because it caused me emotional turmoil.
That sounds like run away
Bro you just got to smash it and stay clear of the head game. Fux it, get dat nut, bounce. Keep it moving.
Maybe she means: You guys are exclusive and so you are still in the “dating stage” not the relationship stage. Being exclusive≠relationship.
The last line confused me and makes me think there is a breakdown in the communication happening here so if she still wants to talk ask her what would happen in the next few months in the future if you agree to stay exclusive (if she does not mention you guys getting into an official relationship then bounce)
She’s insane. Ditch her stank ass.
Say okay, I’ll do the same. good luck.
I can explain: dump her. Don’t waste your time on someone that wants to make it complicated and doesn’t want to give you a sufficient reason why.
If you want a less complicated relationship that makes sense to you, find someone less complicated.
Ok so you’re talking about a singular woman? What she wants is for y’all to date exclusively and continue to get to know each other and truly see where it could go if anywhere at all… It could also be her looking to see if you’re worth truly investing time into in a relationship or if without the “title” and just being exclusive if you cheat
No she wanted *you* to stay exclusive while she shops around some more for someone she deems more worthy
Best thing you can do is say no and bounce trust me it’s not worth sticking around hoping she’ll pick you
Exclusively dating is we’re only seeing each other to works towards eventually having a relationship.
You’re not quite adding in all the other expectations that come with a committed relationship.
Some people just don’t like the title of being in a relationship. As long as she’s being honest with you, that’s all that matters it might make her feel more pressure saying that you’re in a relationship. I felt that way before.
I guess she may be being manipulative but it could also just be a thing that she wants to know you more and more intimately before being in an actual relationship. I see it as she might not want you sleeping with or talking to other people because it may take away from the work and energy needed to really find out if your right for each other.
If you like her and you think not seeing others would be worth it, I would suggest for one, having the same standard. And secondly seeing how you guys would work together realistically since that’s what she’s trying to find out.
She wants to date you exclusively to determine whether she wants a real relationship with you. I’ve seen several now couples do this. Date (possibly date other ppl), date exclusively (only the 2 of you), then decide to be in a relationship and build a future together. That’s my take on it.
That sounds like : her” I’m selfish. I do what I want but you can’t. I’m in control” .. just book it. This girl sounds messy, head ache, complicated and extremely selfish.. yuck. To me the simpler the better the relationships are.
She’s stupid and you need to date a strong smart woman who you can raise smart kids with.
Shes gaslighting you. Shes denying a past interaction and shes invalidating your feelings and putting words in your mouth.
Run OP, run and don’t look back!
Before u explained the absolute RED fucking flag she is; I was gonna explain dating exclusively is when yall have been dating, she’s also been dating with other ppl and she saw u as a potential relationship so she wanted to date exclusively first to see how it feels for the both of u before yall decided/ agree to be in a committed relationship..that’s what dating is supposed to be like. U date ppl until u find one ur interested in, then just date that person, then lay it out on the table that you’d like to be gf bf/ in a committed relationship.
But what she just pulled was absolute b.s. if it took u being confused asking for clarification on what she meant/ said to get that upset n call it all off. You dodged a bullet babe. Cut ur loses and block her number.
Devils advocate, maybe she wants to simply date only you, but isn’t ready for all the things that go along with being in a relationship. Ie. The Instagram posts, meeting the parents (yet). But yes, from the outside looking in, it does seem a bit strange and it may be that she just wants to see other people.
It means you can’t see anyone else but she can.
Run.