Me (18M) just graduated on June 8th and I realized there had been a major drop in contact. Friends I used speak with everyday I haven’t spoken to in weeks. An one of my closest went completely ghost. Not mad but it definitely hurts a little. I have never really lacked social skills it’s easy for me to talk to people. But I can’t help but feel a little alone and also worried . Friends I have known for almost 7+ years seem to disappear. Idk I am just scared that I won’t have any fiends. They say we still cool and shi but it ain’t really don’t feel like that. I see some of my friends kickin it and they don’t hit me. Ik they ain’t tryin to be rude or nun but it does hurt and I just don’t know how to feel better about it. These are people that said “yk I will always be there for u” etc. Idk I mean is it normal for people to just start going different ways after high school?
16 comments
Completely normal, nothing to worry about
I graduated 13 years ago. In the time since then, I maybe talked to friends from school… twice? Friends that I had since third grade onwards, graduated, and poof. Never seen or heard from them since.
It’s normal. Absolutely try and keep contact and stuff, but if it doesn’t work out, you have the rest of the world to find some peeps to do stuff with
When I was 18, a lot of my high school friends parted ways. We talked some but everyone went off to do college and live their own lives in different parts of the world. We kept in touch periodically (maybe 2x per year a call or seeing each other and just checking in on social media otherwise). After graduating college, people got married and had kids, still the same amount of connecting as previously mentioned. It’s an adjustment not to see the same people every day once you graduate high school but it’s such a joy over the years to see where their lives have take them and to be proud of what they’ve done. People need that time in their lives to go out and explore the world and make new connections. So many of the same friends I barely kept in touch with are now some of my closest friends because we shared our childhood experiences together and they just know you deep to your core. Keep your head up and go spread your own wings! Don’t stress too much about staying in the same place with the same people. There is so much to explore in the world and so many people to meet.
The pool of friends narrows down naturally, then whatever it is you do after high school will also allow you to create new friendships. Then even those new people will narrow down as you get to your 30s. At least this was my experience, now I have 5/6 solid friends, 2 of which I became close with after high school and 3 of which Ive known since way back.
My advice to you or anyone at this stage in life is to focus on being their best self. If you do this the right people will be around you, whether it’s friends, sexual partners or career options. People like being around a positive force.
The people I knew that were obsessed with always hanging out with friends were people who were avoiding reality and delaying adulthood. However the earlier you become independent the earlier you can afford to do cool things with cool people while you are still young. My last piece of advice is to avoid hard drugs at all cost. Best of luck and enjoy the ride.
Welcome to adulthood
Yes.
I’m 18m too.
After HS I lost contact with all my friends. You just have to make new ones in college, at work, or doing other activities.
Normal and expected. My closest friends from highschool I haven’t talked to in 10 to 13 years. You’re friends with them because of your proximity every day, and you make friendships with who is available.
Some of us went to different schools, so we weren’t around each other much. They made new friends, I made new friends. Then we just stopped hanging out. And with the friends who went to the same school, we had different majors and saw different people more than each other.
College was a time for me to discover who I was, and to build my own personality on my own terms. And then making friends based on my own personal growth.
Thr friends I had in college I still talk to. Sometimes daily, or at least weekly.
Class of 2015 here. Your 20s will get more lonely
yh that happened 2 me and my fam sadly
This will be a recurring theme in life. If you go to college, you won’t see/hear from most of them after you walk across that stage. Same with colleagues after you leave a company. The older you get the more “friendships” are situational/transactional.
I graduated 7 years ago. Never spoke to a single high school friend since I left that graduation ceremony. Don’t plan to ever gain either.
It’s completely normal. I think the last time I saw one of my hs friends was when I was 18, moving in with my bf. Then u start hanging out with couples.
It’s normal. I’ll get in contact with some friends weekly, others qw pick up right back up after a quarter or even a year.
It is very common and it also happened to me that at every stage you will make new friends that’s it’s
Then suddenly you haven’t seen them in 40 years. Your book is just entering a new chapter.
I haven’t spoken to my classmates in 14 years, I do have them on Facebook though. People grow apart kid, it’s time to get busy living!
Also I made life long friendships in the military, I talk to these folks every few weeks!