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Ok you’re going to laugh at this, but be more selfless.
It’s the backdoor way to deal with worries about self confidence and self esteem. No self, no problems. 🙂
Honestly, the secret towards being more engaging is to open your mouth. You’re likely afraid that whatever you have to say will be twisted or misinterpreted or used against you. You’ve got no control of how others hear your words. You only can control the words you use. So you may as well speak.
Other thing is, you’re not special. What you’re going through might be unique to you, but there are countless others who have been through what you’re going through, at least in part if not in whole and at least at some intensity if not as intense as you’re living it. You never know who might understand what you’re dealing with, and learning you are not alone is a special form of liberating.
They say there’s ppl whom are open books. See yourself as a book that opens up words from there.
One possible — I have a similar problem — method would be to see an occupational therapist (OT). They are quick at noticing what clients would benefit from doing better. If you tend not to be wildly irrelevant or offensive, insurance pays for some and their goal is to help you function in realistic capacities. I don’t believe there are any, but they do. They know and I don’t.
I have a joke about this:
*Occupational therapists pull your head out of your ass. Psychotherapists shove your head up your ass and psychiatrists give them the lube.*