Basically I’m 35 and every time I see an attractive woman in real life I feel really uncomfortable and anxious. If I find myself stuck in close proximity to said woman I just sweat buckets and have a mild anxiety attack.
I’m not looking for help approaching women or anything I just want to be able to leave my house without feeling uncomfortable. At this point I’d be fine being single forever, I just want to be able to enjoy the outside world without getting anxious. Is there some medication that would mellow me the fuck out?
14 comments
What worked for me was to realign my dopamine by lifting weights, no porn, hardly any drugs. Basically just being a basic person brought my anxiety under control, that and just experience in being around women.
Are you doing these things or is it something deeper? If the latter, I’m not sure Reddit will be able to help you other than directing you to get professional help. I have an as-needed beta blocker prescription, but I don’t see that as sustainable for everyday long term use when the issue is being around half of humanity FYI.
Yeah, it’s called alcohol.
Practice
I’ll chime in with the holistic suggestion. Have you considered meditation? For me, the fog cleared and answers appeared when I focused my attention inward.
For the not-so-holistic-but-still-constructive approach, you could consider [Toastmasters](https://www.toastmasters.org/). It’s for speaking, but would allow you to practice…and with practice comes confidence. I worked with a PM who stuttered. He went through Toastmasters and came out on the other side a confident PM-ing machine.
If you want to swing for bleachers, you could do both! Good luck to you. Remember to breathe.
Yes, there are plenty of medications to help with anxiety that is interfering with your life.
Talk to a doctor.
Is it just women that make you anxious? Either way… You might want to look into therapy to help you figure out the root of the anxiety. I doubt there is a quick fix for this, but I think it can be managed.
Try rolling around in feces before you go out so they stay away from you
Maybe therapy. “Attractive” women are just people. They shit and fart just like you and I. There isn’t anything special about them. You are assuming and prescribing value to them. The solution is for you to understand why.
Or you could move to a place where most women are attractive, that way you become desensitized.
Lift heavy weights 4-5 times a week.
You’ll get in better shape, you’ll have more testosterone, more mental clarity, more confidence,
Stop eating processed foods.
Processed foods constantly activate dopamine, which makes it harder for us to get enough normally.
Try and eat as few I ingredients as you can.
This will slowly lead to a more balanced mentality. It will also get you into much better shape physically, which will lead to more confidence.
Stay hydrated,
Studies are showing a lot if ailments are caused by dehydration, most adults live in a constant state of dehydration, which causes depression, and anxiety.
Take 5-10G of creatine every day.
It’s the cheapest safest supplement in existence.
It’s shown to help with mental stability and lower your brain age. It also helps with muscle recovery, and stamina. Which again, better shape, better confidence.
Prozac= you will basically be dead inside- not much will shake you.
Is it just women, or do you feel this way about other things? If it’s just women, do you potentially have some sort of trauma or thing that happened in the past related to them?
I guess my thought is that it being a problematic amount of nerves (instead of normal nerves) stems from something deeper, whether that be a generalized anxiety or a something specific
Ashwaghanda is a good herbal for anxiety. Really helps me reduce my cortisol levels. Exercise helps some.
The best thing for me was to date a super hot woman or two. No anxieties any more. I actually discovered that losing my head over a super hot woman wasn’t good for a long term relationship. Besides, most of them are crazy.
Whiskey
“Attractive” as in what societal norms, current trends and the adulting industry ‘sell’ as attractive? What some call classically attractive?
Or do you mean attractive as in people you are really interested in because they have traits and behaviours that attract you, along with their physical appearance of course?
You will find that those ‘classically attractive’ people , after talking or spending time with them, you will realise you’re not as attracted to them as you initially thought. And that is totally fine.
What I mean, is, you maybe need to introspect a bit and think of what is attractive to you, and by that I don’t mean for you to focus on the physical traits of people.
Hope this helps.