I find that in my generation (early 20s) a lot of people make uncomfortable jokes about how bad their mental health is. I am not talking about one joke, but people who seem to have a trend.
I usually just laugh along even if I am slightly uncomfortable if the mood seems right. However, I’m never 100% sure how to react so I don’t look weirded out.
I don’t wanna seem excessively put off by what they are saying, but I find that 1. Asking more in detail or 2. Joking more about the same thing are out of question. Usually, I get the feeling that they don’t joke about it to get asked personal questions, but also you still need to be carefully tactful and not go over the top.
I dislike it so much – you can never fully predict what kind of reaction is best based on the person. I also don’t want to seem like I’m brushing off their joke or their mental health.
In short, I would like advice on how to react so they still find me friendly, and not dismissive or looking uncomfortable.
I’ve experienced the same thing with a person joking a lot about their weight and being fat, so I guess this could be more generic than just mental health issues. Thank you 🙂
Just to provide an example: recently hanging out with a couple of girls that I don’t know very well, and they kept joking about how traumatic a yoga session was because they were dissociating. Or joking about wanting to k*ll themselves etc.
4 comments
First of all, sorry for any mistake.
In my case (M19) I know many people that joke around with mental health as well as their weigh o any other trait that I know for sure they don’t link.
I’m going to go to the point, if the people who do it are friends, you might ask personally if there is anything you can do, if you have even more confidence you could tell them your opinion about that type of comments, however if you don’t know them very well, try yo be cool about it because it might be thin ice.
In a way its a cry for help, but by making it a joke they want to lower the impact is has on them.
Basically, they cant ask for help and thus portray their bad state through other means. Some get violent, others withdraw and then there are those that joke about them.
I don’t think there’s actually ever a “correct” or “perfect” way to respond to someone. But especially not someone who is making you uncomfortable by oversharing or joking inappropriately about real life issues.
It’s really okay if you just shrug it off with an awkward laugh. But you don’t NEED to heal these people or press into their issues or make THEM feel comfortable in their negative coping mechanisms when they’re making YOU feel uncomfortable first.
It’s also totally okay to set boundaries. If they make you uncomfortable, you can just not talk to them or tell them you don’t know what to say or don’t like those kinds of jokes. You can still be friendly and kind to them. But your feelings matter just as much.
I joke back with my own bad mental health ❤️
Tbh I tend to respond with how they respond to mine coz I’m bad at reacting appropriately too, so I just mirror them.
Sometimes when I hear unalive jokes I’m not entirely sure how I should respond to them. Coz they tend to quickly dismiss it in that masking way, “NAHHH JUST JOKING”. When it happens more than 3 times though, I get the vibe I should say something.
I tend to test the waters a bit with, anything sad you want to talk about? Or anything new with you? Or I just say something related to what I think their problem is.
Idk if those are good ways though because it doesn’t work on everyone.