I would like to meet girls at the US bar/club
So what should I do to fit in ? Are the strategies different depending on if you go to a nightclub or a bar ?
Some strategies I have heard of : bring friends, don’t go alone, have a bottle of beer in your hand, dance a little.
I’m 25, shy, not a party animal. And I’m fully aware it’s better to hang out in a place you truly enjoy. I’m just curious here.
EDIT: Sorry, I’m not shy. I’m just a bit uptight and can’t let loose sometimes
11 comments
I play pool. Maybe you can too. You don’t have to be good, it’s just an easy ice breaker.
The first thing I do is take off my shirt, after that, everything just kind of falls into place.
[deleted]
if you want to meet girls, try the apps and dating websites. If you don’t like bars and/or are shy, you aren’t going to have fun with the added stress of trying to meet strangers.
If you’re not comfortable in an environment you’re not going to do well with new people there.
Go to bars with your friends until you get it. Or meet girls somewhere else. Or both.
Bars are bad places to meet people, especially for us introverts. Music and noise are overwhelming and I just shut down. There are other ways to meet people. Find local clubs and groups that interest you and join those.
Don’t treat is like a videogame. There is no magic gear or dialogue combo that will give you better success. Treat others like people, just as complex as yourself.
>EDIT: Sorry, I’m not shy. I’m just a bit uptight and can’t let loose sometimes
Alcohol
I don’t “fit in at the bar/club”.
If I’m somehow coerced, convinced, or physically dragged there by a friend? My goal is to find a believable excuse to get the hell out of there as soon as possible.
… and finding a nice young member of the more pleasant gender is always a “no questions asked, just go my dude” response from my friends.
Had some really great, sometimes very long, conversations with some young ladies in the parking lot outside the clubs that way though. Easily half of them have had the same goal as me: just find a reason to leave that your friends won’t give you bullshit about.
Nothing wrong with going to a bar alone. Also note that the timing changes the dynamic and expectations are different. My favorite bar moments outside of specific shows are like 45min-2hrs just sipping a couple drinks and reading a book, or shooting some stick with another regular i “kind of’ know on a week day.
Go to a coffee shop in a hipster district and look out of the windows like you’re in a sad music video. If approach, tell people you’re into hiking and “just trying to figure out life by traveling the world right now”.