Dear Reddit community,
My GF (40F) and I (43M) had an honest conversation about past sexual experiences. I am a thoughtful lover, used to being gentle, getting my partner to become comfortable (lots of foreplay, massages, touching, etc.), but I feel I am a bit vanilla when it comes to sex. My GF -while appreciates my thoughtfulness in the bedroom – told me a stories about steamy affairs with assertive and promiscuous men who gave her an amazing experience by going rough and hard with her (doing it in different positions, pounding her hard, dominating her). Since this conversation I cannot stop wondering if I am lacking certain bedroom skills to please her and where I should improve. Does anyone know any decent source materials (books, websites) to improve our sex lives? I want to learn to be a better lover, more adventurous and creative, possible more dominating than today.
Thank you for your help!
2 comments
Wellll… there is a subreddit for literally everything. Watch some couples gone wild, or even tougher stuff like the bdsm Reddit is really good. It is possible to introduce new elements and still maintain that thoughtful lover, gentle side.
Its cool you want to satisfy her in new ways, that being said, Dont change yourself to where youre being somebody youre not. Its an amazing quality that youre loving… this is what real sex is supposed to be about.. genuine intimate connection. The ultimate physical expression of your love. Maybe thinking of it in your own head in a way of it being assertive rather than aggressive will make it more naturally appealing to you. She wants to be dominated, so youre giving her what she wants bc you want to do that for her..? Idk just some thoughts. Its fun to be in control when she wants to be led. Maybe something you can learn with practice