Hey guys!
At this point I feel like I’m really going crazy. I (f/22) have never been able to have orgasms with a guy present, the only time I‘ve cum during sex was when I did it myself with a vibrator while pretending SO hard he wasn’t there.
I feel like the reason is no guy has ever been able to stimulate me as intensely as I need and especially my current boyfriend (who is insanely sexy and I am so attracted to him!!!! Don’t get me wrong!) is more on the gently side.
When I masturbate I fantasize about rough sex and have no problems coming 4-5 times in a row but even when im having rough sex I am nowhere even close to orgasm.
Like, when I think about the sex I’ve had while masturbating alone, I come but not during the actual sex.
I am so frustrated and ashamed and I don’t know what’s wrong with me.
I feel like I’ve tried everything and nothing works, the usual advice (I.e. relax, guide him, tell him what you like whatever) doesn’t work at all, believe me, I have no problem saying what I like, I just don’t like it anymore when a real life guy does it.
Does anyone have any advice??
7 comments
Nothing wrong with you.
When your comfortable and safe with your partner and they do the things you like… You will cum.
Absolutely nothing wrong with you, if you feel comfortable try and introduce some toys into the equation, make it spicy see if that helps
I’m in the same boat as you 🙁 it’s okay we will get through this, if you have a problem with anxiety that could be the cause as well
I see no problem. This is common. My wife frequently gets off using a wand. I love watching. Sometimes we have PIV sex while using the wand on her clit. It’s pretty intense. You could try that.
Can’t relate
it might be your great imagination makes it hard to be satisfied by reality/normal sex.
i think a lot of people orgasm during sex by imagining a hot scenario in their head and maybe youre too hard on yourself.
when you began to masturbate did you feel you had to be quiet and secretive? this could explain why its hard to orgasm without pretending youre alone.
is it the partner you dream about being rough or you being rough?
have you looked for a sex therapist to see what thoughts they have to give? i know they exist but not how to search for a good one. maybe speak to your primary care doctor/pa/np for a list that they use?
Not saying what I can’t back up, but I have been able to provide orgasums to 2 women who had previously been unable to have one unless self administrated. I am not a super man and of normal size, but for some reason even I don’t know I can make any woman orgasum during sex.
I am willing to assist, but no long term and no drama, I will give you the orgasum(s) but just as one human helping another, nothing more.
You can text at two oh seven five hundred and thirty and 60 then sixty again.