[I 20F] have been best friends with this person (I’ll refer to them as Taylor 21F) since elementary school. We did everything together and we decided to be roommates in college because we already practically lived together. We had our typical roommate arguments, Taylor was definitely messier than I was but we worked through it. Our problems started getting worse though when Taylor got into a relationship. I’m going to refer to their partner as Leif.
[Leif- 20M]was in a relationship with another person, but cheated to pursue my friend Taylor. Leif broke up with his partner of 2 years and immediately was with Taylor. They spent one (1) night apart after the break up but besides that Leif jumped from one 2 year relationship right into a new one. This was shocking for me because I didn’t expect them to start dating so soon. All of a sudden I never got to have time with my friend anymore, it was time with Leif and Taylor. Leif kept acting weirder, he would go out with his friends until 3 am but we weren’t allowed to meet his friends. He was very secretive with his phone and I just overall got bad vibes. Considering Leif already cheated to be with Taylor I wouldn’t be surprised if Leif was cheating again. I brought this up, I asked why we couldn’t meet Leif’s friends and he got really defensive. After that he stopped seeing his friends all together and I thought that was even weirder.
Leif had all these stories about how abusive his ex was but the stories never really made sense. Finally I texted his ex (the one that got cheated on) and asked if we could talk. I got to hear the ex’s side of the story and everything started making sense. The ex (I’m going to call her Ally) started telling me about everything I was going through before I had even said a word. She explained how confusing interacting with Leif is. She told me about how nothing ever makes sense, you leave every conversation feeling confused and not understanding what was happening. I was told that Leif was abusive to Ally not the other way around. Ally told me about how she never got to meet his friends either, and told me that my only option was to leave. She said that Leif is good at what he does and there’s no chance for me to save my friend Taylor, I just have to hope that she figures it out for her self. I thought that if I continued being nice or if I just silently stayed by Taylor’s side that would be my best option, so Taylor knows that I am here for her if things go wrong. But Leif did his magic and now Taylor wont speak to me. She’s been isolated. Taylor dropped out of college, doesn’t have a job, doesn’t speak to their family. She only has Leif. I am trying really hard to cope with the loss of my best friend while understanding that what she’s experiencing is abuse. Ally was right in saying that my only option was to leave. Taylor got sucked in and I was just treated like shit. I wish I wasn’t so angry sometimes but I really do hate Leif.
There’s a lot of other details that I left out. We all live together but the environment got so toxic that I had to move out. I am going back to pack my things but besides that Taylor and Leif now get to live their happily ever after and I was just left behind.
TLDR- My best friend started dating this person who is shady and now we aren’t friends anymore, so I’m a big sad friend-less baby.