So I (F23) have been talking to this guy (M21) i met on Tinder and i like him and haven’t had this feeling for someone in so long . we talk all the time and i feel like we’re a match. dating apps kinda suck and with my busy work schedule I was honestly just looking for a hookup. but then i met him and see myself actually dating him. He’s in college in my state and we only met twice. he’s back home now and we haven’t had sex yet , but im fine with that. i rather it be in a good place. We shared our kinks with each other her and it seems like we have similar interests he’s talked about being pegged many times and at first i never wanted to do that to a man but if it makes him satisfied i can try
but he talks about it a lot and i know it turns him on and it urns me on to be in control. then i started visualizing it more and feel disgusted by it, i can’t see myself fucking a guy in the ass, it doesn’t give me pleasure, i don’t want to see his asshole or be near it , im scared he’s gonna shit. so many things going on in my head.
i don’t know if i’m comfortable with this and i feel bad i told him i’ll do it and im into it when im not. or maybe i should just try it but it’s cringe to think about ..
i like him a lot and would like to visit him before he comes here at least. should i just do it or follow my instincts.. and have you guys ever got into a kink you really weren’t into
8 comments
Communicate it and don’t do anything untill ur ready. Ull be ok
Talk to him about your concerns. Is he experienced with how to prep himself (cleaning)? Has he been pegged before?
Instead of going straight to pegging, you could start by working a dildo into him with your hand, and you could position yourself to the side, with him on his back so you don’t have to see his hole. He can finger you, or use a toy on you at the same time. See how that goes, and go from there.
Ugh I had a guy not only try to get me to do this but actually act on it and bring a dildo to my house and try to push it on me. It was awkward to turn down in the moment so I would make sure you have a discussion beforehand. If it’s something that totally turns you off I can’t see it turning into something pleasurable for you quickly. I’d watch some videos and see if it’s something you can see yourself getting into. Is it a hard no, soft no, or a yes. Have the conversation
Don’t do anything you don’t want to. But it also seems like you two are going from 0-60 way too fast. I would want to make sure regular sex felt okay first. And before playing “bend over boyfriend” I’d want to test out the waters on the dominance play first, does it feel right? Is there mutual trust? And before making the investment in pegging gear make sure things like simple anal play are okay.
Anyone who actually respects you and consent will not make a fuss about this. I say no after a yes like half the time and my bf is never bothered. You’re fully allowed to change your mind. You’re not contracted.
It’s fair that you’re worried, honestly it’s surprising he told you about it; it’s not easy to find guys into pegging, even less guys that will tell you right away. I think he got too carried away with it, he might be mad/sad when you tell him but if he respects you he will listen to your worries.
It’s possible that you have some misconceptions around pegging.
Everyone has the right to decide what they do and don’t want to do in bed. But sometimes fears and misconceptions can get in the way of responding rather than reacting to your partner’s request.
This recording addresses those fears and assumptions, but does not try to convince. It might help!
• Givers: https://peggingparadise.com/blog/2015/09/podcast-112-for-the-ladies/
Don’t do it if you don’t want to. He could be god, you don’t want to don’t do it