What is the rudest thing a stranger has ever said you you? And what was your comeback?

19 comments

1. I don’t know. I don’t care or listen to what strangers have to say, and my “comeback” is to keep walking

2. One time I went to buy bus tickets. The ticket was 2 Ron, but I only had a 100 bill. So instead, I paid in coins. 1 Ron and the rest coins so I wouldn’t take all her change. The lady looks at me in disgust and tells me “May God give you as much in life as you have given me here” I said “excuse me?” And she repeated. Then I said “Thank you, same”. I smiled at her and left because worked in a box full of newspapers and I assumed she’s already miserable enough.

3. In college, I was at a matchmaking party of sorts for Valentine’s day. Everyone was assigned half of a famous couple as a name tag and you had to find the other half (who was of the opposite sex, this was in the mid-00s, gay people weren’t considered) as a sort of icebreaker.

   The party isn’t so bad, it’s at an ice rink which I always enjoy, and we have free soft drinks and one alcohol coupon per person (I can understand why they didn’t want people drunk off their tits on bladed skates, yknow?) So I don’t really think about finding my other half.

   She ends up finding me. She looks me up and down and goes “Ugh… Yeah, no, ew”. And skates away.

   I didn’t really have a comeback for *that*, so I kept on skatin’.

4. I grew up in a small hometown with nothing to do but drink, so a past time for local teenagers was to drive around and yell “f*ggot” at anyone walking on the sidewalk, so probably that. Not really any good comeback to someone going 40-50 mph so most people would just act like they didn’t hear them and they’d look disappointed to not get a reaction. This went on for like the entire decade I lived there, so it wasn’t one group and spanned a long time. Super weird.

5. Back in the day I told my crush that I had a thing for her. She didn’t say anything…but her sister did. Something to the effect of “lol ur a creeper gtfo”.

   We’re the exact same age. It hurt, but whatever

6. Back story: I live with an ostomy, which is where your intestines are re-routed to come out of your abdomen and you wear a device to catch the output. It’s a bag taped to your stomach to catch poop.

   It was a weekend morning and I ran out to grab nice coffee for my wife and me, so I’m in just some sweatpants and a t-shirt. At one point, I stretch with my arms overhead. This raised my t-shirt enough that the tail of my poop bag became visible for a second.

   The woman in line in front of me was facing my direction and saw the bag. She looked me dead in the eyes and said I was “Disgusting.” I was so confused and she must have seen it on my face. “I know what that bag is for. You’re disgusting to be out in public and in an eating establishment with that thing”, waving her hand at my stomach.

   “Oh. Yeah. I’m sorry. I would have expected someone like you to be more forgiving of those with disabilities.”

   “Someone like me?”

   “My bad. With that attitude I just assumed you were mentally disabled.”

   That shut her up.

7. When I worked at an auto parts store, at least once a week I’d have to deal with some random idiot who threatened violence for selling him the “wrong parts.” They were always the parts he asked for, of course, just not the ones he needed to fix the problem because the idiot gave wrong information when buying the parts. And my assumption is they were just too dumb and arrogant to acknowledge when they don’t know something, and some people are so far gone that they don’t even know what kind of car they drive (which is bizarrely common among car owners).

   The really fucked up thing is that if I had told them to fuck off, I would have lost my job. So I would just have to stand there and be professional while some middle-aged moron threw a hissy fit over a problem that he had created for himself.

8. Wasn’t at me but my friend sitting right next to me. He’s a bigger guy but probably the nicest person you will ever meet and this girl in ear shot of everyone in the class called him a fat slob and he smelled. I said the only reason she is skinny was because she throws up after every meal.

9. High School. Was standing with two girls. I wasn’t really friends with either so I am not sure why I was there. But one says I have a nice butt. The other says “Yeah, too bad he doesn’t have a face to match.”

   I had no comeback. I was destroyed.

10. At a bar a few years ago, I saw a girl who I *thought* was giving me the eyes. So after a couple drinks, I walked over and said “Hey.” She said “Ew.”

    I didn’t have a comeback, I just went back to my friends and pretended like nothing happened, even though I felt horrible on the inside.

11. Years ago…before cell phones.

    I was driving up to another college to visit a friend. But since there were no cell phones I had no way of contacting him once I got on campus.

    So as I was driving through fraternity row, I saw a decently attractive girl walking so I pulled over to ask for directions.

    She looked over and said “no way” like I was going to hit on her. She also had a ‘ew’ look on her face.

    So I replied “don’t flatter yourself tubby, im just looking for the Delta Upsilon House.”

    Cringe now. But the 90s were a different time.

    Funny enough…she gave me directions.

12. I was cashiering and a lady paid 7 dollars and some change all in loose coins so I had to count it all out.

    As I’m counting she says “I know you’ve got an earpiece and they’re telling you to go as slow as possible, but can you pick it up”

    I was kinda in disbelief since she was the one who paid in all coins, but I said “my bad” and proceeded to count as slowly as I possibly could. Making sure to fumble coins along the way.

    The Whole interaction which could have been so fast ended up taking much longer and I made sure to remind her to have a nice day at the end of it.

13. I spit outside into one the gravel rock median while walking out out to my csr in a Wal-Mart parking lot. I have pretty bad seasonal allergies and just had to get some junk out. Figured it was far enough away from everyone and no big deal.

    This lady yells out to me from maybe 6 cars away, while still in her vehicle. “You’re fucking disgusting!”

    And I responded with “I could start smoking Crack today and in two years I’d still be prettier than you.”

14. One time in middle school we were partnered with random classmates, I got partnered with this one girl. Her best friend told her “ha-ha you got partnered with BobbyWasabiMk2!”, to which my partner forced a grin.

    Not gonna lie, I didn’t recover from that.

15. The idea of having a comeback for a rude stranger is weird to me. Why would I give a shit? If I only have a single data point about a random person, and that data point is “rude,” then that person is literally nothing to me. No one of any consequence whatsoever. Beneath my notice. I’m not going to waste time or mental energy on a comeback. I’m just going to keep walking.

    And if they think my complete non-engagement means they “won,” that’s fine. They can think that if they want. They completely and utterly failed at what they were trying to do, which was get under my skin enough to disrupt my day. So I “won” in every way that matters, and then I simply got on with my day.

16. Meeting my little sister’s best friend when I was about 40, and she bleated out, “Oh. You’re just an ordinary man.”

17. “You look like someone else”

    every.

    single.

    time.

    i met them.

    and it was always a 10 second conversation.

18. Not the rudest thing they’ve said but done to me.

    As a kid: I was on a roller coaster one day and I sat behind these two older girls. I was probably about 8-10. They we’re a few years older at least. The ride started and we we’re going down the drop. One of the girls turned around and told me: “don’t be shocked”. Then when the ride tilted to the right, they just flailed their arms like crazy people and screamed their asses off (wasn’t a big roller coaster at all. It was an indoor one). We went through a tunnel about 10 seconds later and the girl to the right turned around and spit on me. I had never spoken to or seen those girls before or since. She did that 3 times (we went around the track 3 times and she spit on me every time we went through the tunnel). Fucking bitch. The kicker is after the ride was over, I got back on the ride and those bitches had told the girl working the ride that I was spitting on them because the girl working the ride told me to stop spitting on them. I told her they we’re the ones spitting on me. I ended up sitting in the way back for that ride while they we’re at the way front. Didn’t get them back for that one unfortunately.

    As an adult: Happened last month actually. I was selling an iPod Touch for 50$. I had a guy message me telling me he was interested and we arranged a meet up. I showed up at the gas station we agreed to meet up at the next day and waited. I waited for over half an hour and he never showed up. Completely wasted my time. I ended up reporting him to marketplace and gave him a one star rating for not showing up. Unfortunately for him, I remember his name and now will never sell anything to him on there. Asshole. Apparently, my girlfriend knows the guy through one of her former friend’s and he’s an idiot. Almost made a separate ad warning people about him after what he did.

19. One of my wife’s friend told to my face that I looked like a “boring man”, I didn’t react at all cuz she was a nearly married 23yo a-hole.

    3 months later, her husband dumped her for a younger, hotter girl. I had to hold my smile when my wife told me that, not gonna lie.