Been with my partner for about 14 months he is in recovery or so I thought he has had multiple relapses through the relationship and each time goes ghost for days the calls up apologising and being in recovery myself from alcohol I show empathy and support for his disease. (Been sober nearly 2 years)
Now he had been clean for nearly 3 months when he had some issues with his phone.. I went through it with his permission and found so many things he had been hacked and the phone was being used externally however in saying this I found out he had been on internet chat sites getting dirty with other women at the beginning of our relationship. (Say first 4 months).
I’m completely heartbroken and don’t know whether to end the relationship or try and forgive him.
He has been doing much better and is perfect for me in every other way. He is kind and compassionate is there for me just lately we have been fighting a bit due to his insecurities and the fact I have not been putting my all in to the relationship as I seem to have abandoned my needs.
Anyone been in a similar situation?
Could you recover and get back on track or did it need to end?
Any advice would be appreciated.
TIA
5 comments
I think it really depends on how to Situation was at the beginning. Were you both serious from the beginning? Did you talk about, what this is? ( As in friends with benefits, serious relationship and so on)
Did you talk about being exclusive?
If it was 100% sure, that you guys were seriously dating and that you were supposed to be exclusive, I would see that as a huge red flag and I think I could not forgive that.
However if you think you could, I would still talk to him and explain him your feelings and how it hurted you ( or whatever you felt)
I doubt it will get better, if you dont communicate honestly with each other and work things out. Guess you should also decide how to go on based on his reaction.
At least thats what I would do =] Good luck
Don’t go through his phone would be my primary advice.
It was early in your relationship and if there’s no evidence he’s still doing it I would let it go.
Never date an addict
You are so early in your recovery it is crazy to stay with an active addict. Dump him
There is a reason recently sober and clean people shouldn’t date.