I have anxiety in most social situations, and I don’t have very good social skills, I’m easily confused and often unsure of what is happening/what to do. But for some reason people seem to ask me when they don’t know something, although usually I don’t know either, so I just tell them that I’m not sure or I don’t know. I think I must unconsciously be doing something to make myself appear approachable to strangers? I’m not sure but my social skills are kind of trash so I don’t know what to do in these situations. Any suggestions?
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As someone who is working on feeling less socially anxious, and who also seems to be the type of person that strangers for directions, I think it’s because you must appear non-threatening. Your overall demeanour will create that – the way you stand, the way you’re dressed, facial expression, etc.
I think it’s definitely a positive, and it’s something I try to keep in mind when I feel anxious in a social situation. People must think I look approachable, because they keep approaching me, a total stranger.
Don’t worry about saying you’re not sure/don’t know. You could even use it as a jumping-off point into some small talk with a stranger, or even a full-blown conversation. Say you’re both waiting for the same train and they ask you ‘Do you know if this is the train to Xtown?’ Maybe you say ‘Yes it is, and it’s on time today, thankfully!’ Add little comments like that which might prompt a response from them, and so on.
More small interactions like these will help you feel more confident over time and improve your social skills. I hope that’s helpful.
I go through phases of being super approachable; random people will strike up conversations with me, tourists will stop me and ask questions about the city, random ppl will compliment me. A lot of it comes down to wardrobe, when I’m dressed in bright clothes with quirky style choices. It also comes down to attitude, I find that I am approached more when I am feeling bright, energized, and at ease with myself.
It also helps to approach others, say hi, ask how someone’s day was. It creates this air of friendliness and changes how you carry yourself.