I know this reads all kinds of wrong. I 33(f) am a healthy woman. I did have surgery last year in July to remove pelvic cysts. I also haven’t had any penetration in over a year.
I recently decided to have sex with my ex. The problem is I cannot take penis. By cannot take penetration it feels like a rough inside out massage. I’m always very very wet and aroused but as soon as he starts it hurts. I’ve talked to my doctors. Nothing is causing pain. I just don’t like penetration that much.
Here’s the only thing that works. My partners literally have to beg and plead with my vagina to relax enough to allow sex. Usually it’s tons of praise dirty talk etc.. lots of kissing and I’ve asked my partner if it’s strange and he openly stated it’s very odd but he doesn’t mind.
I’ve only had 3 partners all similar experiences. I allow sex to please them but I would rather mutual masturbation or oral.
Any thoughts? Advice? Experience? Random things to add? I refuse to date if sex continues to be this way… who would accept it?
2 comments
if sex is hurting you chances are your partner isnt doing enough to relax you.
Ask for more oral, kisses… Whatever Makes you feel at ease. You mentioned that you are having penetrative sex to please them. If they are getting an orgasm it’s a little odd you can’t ask for more to relax you. I never recommend just allowing sex to happen. If you are up to it, I’d also suggest toys. Yes, I know it sounds scary… But play with some smaller dildos from time to time. Go at your own pace. It’s also important to note your own pelvic structure… Some women are literally built different.. for example my pelvis sits at about a 90° angle. So certain positions are HELL for me…. You’ll need to evaluate what’s comfortable.
Once you can handle a standard dildo is a good time to practice with a partner. Get on top and allow yourself to control the depth and force. The most important part is to be SURE you have picked a partner whom is patient with you.
Doesnt sound bad to me at all. I dont like penetration, too. Its boring and doesnt feel good. I dont want to do penetration ever again. I want to touch, smell, see, taste and hear a wet pussy. Thats why i love pussy eating a lot! Its so intense compared to penetration.
Its true, most people think that penetration is like the main act of sex. To me, its just a kink, and i dont have a penetration kink. If i didnt know you are supposed to penetrate a women, i would gave never came up with the idea by myself, it sounds totally absurd to me xD its like trying to write or draw with my penis! I would prefer using my hands