TW: Sexual Assault (past experience not current scenario)
Today was the first time I have gotten to be truly intimate with my boyfriend of nearly 2 years. It got to a point where I asked him to go down on me. It went well for a bit before I ended up getting really overstimulated and asked him to stop. He did and after a few seconds I started crying. I had a full on breakdown and we stopped and cuddled for a while. There are potentially two reasons I believe this may have happened but it might not be either and that’s what I would like to know. The first is that I have sensory issues, I already get really ticklish and squirmy during intimacy but never enough that it causes me to have to ask my boyfriend to stop. I don’t know if potentially these sensory issues could have contributed to the overstimulation and since I have issues with overstimulation in the first place triggered the response. The second thing and what I’m leaning towards is a trauma response from being sexually assaulted 3 years ago as oral had been one of the things my assaulter had tried to do. I thought I had gotten over it as I have done pretty much everything else he did with my current boyfriend and been completely fine, however this is the first time I have done oral specifically since. I also just wasn’t sure if this is potentially just a thing that can happen naturally.
TLDR: I cried after oral unsure if it’s sensory, a trauma response, or just something that can happen.